Thursday, December 23, 2010

CF2010 & Merry Xmas!

Let me help you with that ribbon...

Early Christmas greetings coz i will be off very soon.

As promised, photos for both day of CF courtesy of SURFACE's photographer my bro.

Overall, the event wasn't too bad but the accessibility to it was horrible. We could have died if there was a fire since the only way to get to that floor was via lifts which arrived 15 mins after you press the button.

The crowd wasn't too bad this year round despite all that and the quality of cosplayers locally are on a steady rise.

Ok folks, i've gone to Japan for a week and will be un-contactable.

Monday, December 20, 2010

mini minor updates

Watched TRON Legacy on Saturday and i took a walk down memory lane. Loved it much and i wanna get so inspired by it. Simplistic design using neon-lighted body suits. How awesome is that.

Attended Comic Fiesta during the weekend and will soon put up links to event photographs courtesy of SURFACE's photographer, my bro.

Will be in Japan for a week starting 23rd of this month till the 31st. i'll be totally unreachable during that extent so please take note buddies.

busy preparing and planning for the trip now, cya.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Give me the Green Light

Remember a couple of posts back i said something about having good news to disclose? i have been given the green light to make it known now.

My name is listed around the 15th from the bottom

Cu.eL (Shaman)

Yup, i managed to get selected to have my work featured for Otacool 4 Worldwide Illustrators! *A* As far as i know there's another Malaysian in that book, which is no other than SURFACE group leader Pcmaniac88 who even got selected for prize awards to which he won lightsaber chopsticks...bastard...

Guess it has been a good and fulfilling tiger year.

i'm ready to go right now~
i'm ready to go right now~

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Oh What's New?

We failed to live up to the expectations of being the ideal good 3rd years to our lects and tutors again. We will be jobless and no company will hire us for our awesome suckiness in skill and attitude!

It's a good semester...

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween!!!

Happy Cuelloween! i want to be the lollipop (*´Д`) =3 -3 =3

Happy Halloween peepz.

Nothing much to be happy about though. We don't celebrate it much here hmm? definitely coz its origins are western so yeah. The Celtic equivalent of version of Hungry Ghost Festival or something.

Still, i have always enjoyed myself for this Festive and still will for some time to go. I think i mentioned this before so i'll spare you the details.

Anyways, enjoy my annual 'pumpkin' carving session.

1. Select a fresh pumpkin in a shape that pleases me.

2. Mark the necessaries in preparation of carving.

3. Cut off the top and start scooping the stuff outta the pumpkin.

4. Follow the pattern made earlier as i cut my way through the pumpkin.

5. Remove the cut outs and do further refining to the pumpkin.

6. Place the lighting inside the pumpkin to create an eerie glow.

Adios while i show off my newly carved pumpkin.
You can carve your own pumpkins too!

Thursday, October 14, 2010


Happiness...i think it has been quite a while since i really felt true happiness. i am content and happy with life the way it is now, but not quite the kind of "WOOHOOO I'M SO HAPPY MY ENDORPHINS ARE OVERFLOWING!!!!!1111 PEACE!!!" -orgasmic kind of happiness. i have great difficulty recalling when was the last time i really felt that way.

Closest i get to this feeling is of when i have achieved a goal or target i personally imposed on myself. But still not quite there yet. Even after i received some pretty good news that i was looking forward to for this whole year, i wasn't even near that level of elated-ness. (i'll disclose what this particular event is after some stuff has been finalized)

So, yea. Is this part of the process of growing up? Little little things that can make you go hyper previously just makes you go meh now. I'm not exactly an uncle or grandpa yet to say that i have seen it all, but basically my outlook on life is pretty neutral at this stage. Nothing to look forward to, just going with the flow kind of thing.

Maybe this will all change when i find my other half, but i'm not lamenting on the absence of it. In fact i'm pretty comfy the way i am now. Still, i guess i'll never know how far i can go by finding that other half. Think i'll just let things be and go with the wind.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

World number 1 Pest

When we entered the new millennium, humans have begun evolving at exponential rates, especially technologically. We aren't the only species to do so though. Silently, some organisms of this world have slowly begun evolving too.

And out of those...there is one that has caused us great suffering. One that has evolved to bring a whole new meaning to the term 'annoying'.


It is to my believes that mosquitoes have evolved to be able to sense brain waves of it's potential killer-wannabes. Over the many generations of their fore fathers that ended up being flattened or poisoned, they have honed their survival skills to the highest form of sensing killing intent. Or your stares. Or even your thoughts of wanting to search them out. More familiarly known to us as "spider sense".

And from this belief, i came to derive a categorization of the new breed of mosquitoes that has been identified for now.

The Common Mosquito
Numbered are the days of this dumb breed of mosquitoes that have "SMACK ME" written all over their tiny bodies. Count your blessings if you ever encounter any of this type as it is rare indeed.

Traits: Slow fliers. Is always in plain sight. Slow in reacting.

Danger level: Lowest

Difficulty level: Lowest

The Kamikaze Samurai
You sure as hell better wish you spot this one quick and get rid of it before these little pesky warriors end up dealing A LOT OF DAMAGE before committing suicide in the fan or escaping; Depending on when they are discovered. This breed ignores all external forces and aims to only to deal the most amount of annoyance to you. They laugh at the face of danger. No amount of wind or leg-shakes will deter these blood thirsty bastards. They cling so hard to you that you can huff and puff at them to no avail. Good thing about that is that they are quite easy to kill once spotted. Also, makes sloppy escape attempts to dark places. Once found, easily disposed off due to sluggishness after the attacks.

Traits: Sticks to you like a magnet. More movement from you = more hits from them. Earth, storm and fire is no deterrent.

Danger level: Medium

Difficulty level: Easy

The Resistance Fighter
These mofos ignore the use of mosquito coils and the likes. No amount of poison will stop them in their tracks. Very annoying once you lure yourself into the false security of setting up your safety parameters only to have it useless in the face of these shits. Changing to another brand of mosquito repellent helps slow them down for a couple of days. Will usually strike when you are sleeping after setting up your parameters.

Traits: Highly resistant to mosquito coils. Speed might be lowered with use of mosquito coils.

Danger level: Medium

Difficulty level: Tough

The Ninja
True to the art of ninjutsu, you practically almost can't spot these @$HOLES! Now you see them, *blinks* now you don't. They are one with the shadows. Any terrain is useful to them as camouflage. They have also honed their senses to the highest level and is the most sensitive among the others towards brainwaves. You swear that you are looking at your legs the whole time, and still fail to notice them stinging you where everything is in plain sight. They can bend light around them to completely mask their presence. They can annoy you the whole night and still get away with it only to annoy you again the next day. Only time you can catch them off guard is during the day, if you know where to look for them.

Traits: Extremely hard to spot. Has the highest mind reading abilities.

Danger level: Shit hits the fan.

Difficulty level: You are better off giving up and conserving energy than hunting them.

The Pack Wolves
Sonofabi- this one takes the cake. They swarm over you in not less than 5 (usually more) and confuses you in an attempt to focus on any one of them. Chances are you'll be flinging away trying to get rid of this deadly swarm than to target any single unit for killing. By the time you've scattered them away, they've already landed a few bites on you. Once split, they will fall into their own sub categories of those mentioned above.

Traits: Pack mentality to overwhelm you. Difficult to shake off.

Danger level: An addition or multiple of the danger levels the pack consists of.

Difficulty level: OH SHI-

The Illusionist
The imaginary mosquitoes. They are REALLY not there but it's just you...becoming phobic and feels like there is something fluttering in between the crevices and contours of your body. Appears when you have been annoyed for far too long and your tolerance threshold has been breached.

Traits: You feel something touching the hairs of your body. You imagine mosquitoes lurking in the shadows.

Danger level: You've gone mental.

Difficulty level: Takes a few days of mosquito free environment to heal.

*all types possess a certain amount of brainwave reading, except for maybe the common mosquito that existed way before the millennium.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Down with It

An accumulation of things this past week, has finally made my body succumb to the forces of nature.

Been shifting things in and out of me and my bro's room to get our floor tiles fixed. Had some problems with the tiles turning loose after we moved in for a year plus. Had to forebear a few months of having creaking tiles like the traps of Prince of Persia game.

And finally, just last week contractors came over to get the tiles fixed. I think i inhaled a year's supply of dust that has left my nose swollen and dripping on a daily basis. Shifting furniture in and out of the rooms were the worst part of the whole fiasco.

While typing this blog entry, i am on my 4th day of camping in my brother's room. His was the smaller one and so had it fixed before mine. And i was rejoicing that i would have mine back tonight after some shifting of furniture back in. (thanx bro for putting up with a shitty room mate that messes up your room further and whines like no tomorrow)

But gawd damn contractors failed to show up today to do the finishing touches. THEY JUST NEEDED TO PAINT THE DAMN FINISHING ON THE WALLS. ANGRY KAI IS ANGRY -_-

Another day i would most probably have to spend my weekends this week like the last, to move stuff back in and reorganize my room. I'm seriously lagging behind in college works thanks to this. I'm barely getting by with the half-assed works i've been showing. Not to mention it is already hard as it is to get my arse motivated.

Thanx to all that flaming anger, i burnt myself out today and fell sick. Sweet.

On a happier note, new chapter of One Piece is gonna be up soon in a couple of hours.

Saturday, September 18, 2010


Menkui = the japanese word for being superficial/ attracted by physical looks only.

Yep, that's me at this stage. Nothing else matters as long as there's eye candy.

Don't wanna dwell on having concepts for everything. i just wanna have fun and enjoy doing what i love with no restrictions. It's ok to just ignore all else sometimes.

more WIP for the next OTACOOL entry.

my shaman character did years back

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Roses are blue, Violets are violet

With some requests from friends on how i draw my roses. Once you get the idea behind it it's not so hard after all. Oh and this is only a generic rose. There are so many kinds of roses out there and each unique to itself. But fundamentally, this can be applied to most (i think)

So, here you go folks.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

IT IS SO HARD! start anything at all.

FFFFFFFFFFF...i'm practically forcing myself to do a lot of things. Forcing myself to work on assignments, to update this blog and to finish off the work about to be featured below.


Could it be i have finally mastered trying to take things easy? i know i should be worried about being so slack but i ain't! My fears and stress of not doing any work has just evaporated into thin air. The logical part of my brains are sensing impending doom so it's actually helping and forcing me along in survival. If not for it i guess i wouldn't have done anything at all.

Anyways, enough of that. I just hope it's a phase i'm experiencing after taking a short break. So yea i'm busy joining competitions again and trying to at least make it into one of em to mark this as a successful year. No loss tho if i don't make it coz it's really pushing me to keep producing.

Here's the latest piece i did to try to end up representing Malaysia in OTACOOL
drafted the rough in my warped-by-water sketchbook

scanned it and fixed up some parts

the outline stage

a rough color rendition of what i would want for the end results

i always work on the character first

what just happened between the previous step and this?
i totally scrapped the shitty background i came out with in the rough. Have no idea how i thought it looked ok at that time.

Final touches to the character and background before cropping up the pic for a tighter composition.

Damn...i'm so not used to coloring in light tones anymore. Coloring dark pictures have screwed up my sense of depth quite a bit. For example, the pic below, which was the first entry for the same competition.

i hope to be able to work on a 3rd piece. Futile it might be but hey, i can't give up on a competition that demands for original characters can i? my own stuff especially...never felt happier joining.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Happy Birthday Miku

31st August

3 years old nao...♡ (´・ω・`)

Monday, August 30, 2010


wip of my submission for Otacool contest.


Momentum is uberly important to me when i need a kick start to work on something. Before my sem break started i was superbly over-excited in getting to do my own stuff. Due to the constant momentum of having to deal with my assignments, my drive did not waver. But 2 weeks have passed since then and i'm already in my final week of break.

I sort of regretted going for that Penang totally threw me off the mood to draw when i got home. Worst still my computer problem resurfaced and i had to spend a couple of days fixing it into working conditions again. I just got it repaired (i hope) and by now i'm already almost out of steam. Guess i just have to make the most out of it. Now i wouldn't be able to spam submit the Otacool competition i was planning to join.

Again...i'm not ready to face the next semester...things are moving a little wee too fast for my liking here.

Oh by the way, Muramasa: The Demon Blade is fun <3

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Up there


Tuesday, August 17, 2010


Going to Penang for roughly 3 days. Starting tomorrow back on Friday. In case for those wondering where i've gone to for the next few days.

Monday, August 16, 2010




i'm learning to take things easy this round. Won't be handling commissions. Take my time doing some personal works. Daily sketching and self exploration. Gaming non stop and catching up on lost time on movies, animes & mangas. i lost my internet connection for roughly a couple of days and found that time passed by so slowly that i had ample time to do the things i liked. It's good to feel the slow pace of things again once in a while. i just totally dumped the whole workaholic mentally for the extent of this break.

i noticed now that i have urges to do more traditional works lately. Watercolor in particular. After all the enthusiasm of going purely digital now i find myself reverting to getting dirty on pencil and paper. Human nature again to long to do something that you don't have the privilege of doing anymore. It's funny how we always contradict ourselves.

Speaking of contradictions, i'm a walking contradiction myself. Like i mentioned before, way back when i was still in my teens i used to be prejudice towards stuff like gothic lolita and now i'm finding myself gaga over it. i also used to hate the color green but thanx to a certain vocaloid, i have learnt to find beauty in that color as well. It's hard to name my favorite color now if you ask me about it.

i think my strongest point in art lies in colors. Ever since it started from a hobby, i was very particular about the colors i used. So now with no particular special preference for a certain color, i find myself having a lot of fun and freedom exploring with color combinations that bring out a certain mood or impact to a picture. i'm far from perfection though, even if i perceive it to be my forte. Regardless, i just want to have fun while doing what i love best.

i strayed from what i really wanted to say. Anyways, back to contradictions. i think what is important is that we learn to figure out which is the side of contradictions that would help elevate us into another level. Sometimes we remain rigid about it being our 'personality' or 'habit' which defines us. Maybe due to our ego or just part of us that wishes to not change, we sometimes end up shutting ourselves up in the bad end of it. And so we stop our own growth in that aspect.

i self-reflect whenever i can and found that i have changed quite a bit over the years. i try to correct some quirks within myself to some success, while picking up other idiosyncrasies along the way. It's almost an endless loop, but that's what makes us a little bit better each time we try to confront it.

i have this feeling that i might have just turned more eccentric and twisted within my own world. But that's just me. You be the judge.

i'll end off with some step-by-steps of what i've been up to.

rough sketch

color thumb

initial base and touchup

further refinement

preliminary textures

more texture spam and final result

Based off this video and song. i endlessly looped it while working on it to get into the mood. i enjoy drawing something of this genre but i can't do it all the time as it creeps me out while i'm on it. The creepier i make it the more scared i make myself. Yes i am afraid of ghosts and horrors ._.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Computer Problems Pt. 3

Part 3 i think....since i started this blog

Give me just another week...i need to finish up my finals before you kaput.

i am never spared from computer break downs every sem. Without fail.

i seem to have a running curse with computers. My old one kept giving me hardware failures. MY NEW ONE IS STARTING TO DO THE SAME. and its barely 2 years old...what am i doing wrong -_-

i think without the help of my bro i would have given up long ago and changed like 2-3 new computers within the span of 3 years, 1 for each year. He wasted as much time (if not more) than me trying to troubleshoot the shittiest problems i always face with my computers. What would i do without him D:

This is why i hate hardware and just get by with the bare minimal knowledge of running and troubleshooting this hunk of metal.

aih. so sick of this i barely have the mood to do my work now. Back-upping as much important stuff as i can right now while i'm typing this. Screw digi illust finals for now.

Nothing ruins my mood more than computer problems. Life sucks when you know you have to depend on something unreliable to get past your life.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Repetition -> Habit

"I wake up in the morning with nothing, at the end of the day i have something" ~Christian Lorenz (Swiss artist)

That quote best describes the passion we as artists have very well. Each day we create something new and it satisfies us at the end of it. I used to think that it was a chore to draw daily and would only like to do it whenever i felt like it. That was at a time long past when i hadn't really delved myself into art college.

Although i still loathe working on my assignments at a non-stop basis, at the end of the day there is that certain satisfaction of accomplishment. In between those hectic moments i feel even more joy on having to work on my own stuff. Ever more so desperately now with the limited moments of actually not having to fulfill a deadline.

I've really become a workaholic. I feel fidgety if for a day i did not put something down on pencil and paper. I'll end up sleeping that night feeling guilt and remorse for having done nothing productive. It's quite hard to take it easy but at least i have started to learn how to minimize my stress levels when necessary.

On another note, art block is hard to come by these days as i always do have something i would wanna do. Sure squeezing out ideas for assignments ain't always a walk in park but it gets easier and easier with familiarity. As for personal works, i have too much on my mind to really get any art block. Just that i lack the time to create those pieces i have stored somewhere in the parts of my brain that aren't filled with porn nonsensical whims.

Anyways, i have been getting myself involved in quite a few competitions this sem. I'm quite surprised to find out that i didn't suffer burnout as badly as the previous sems. It seems that the more i do works for myself, the more energized i would be for a while. It keeps me happy although i know i might be sacrificing much of my time for sleep, play, and etc. I even concentrate and work faster on my assignments after that -_-;;

Oh well, signing off for now. Bz bz bz with life that i don't update this place as much as i would love to. Ranting about negative stuff would be easy but this would just make my blog a gloomy place to drop by. I'll also end up sounding like a whiny biatch. Sooooo yea. Lately it's turning out to be more like a diary for myself.

Have some random quicky of my mascot girl here while i go back to living my sad existence. Abusing textures and using colors i seldom use is fun.

Dat ass...

Monday, July 26, 2010

Upcoming Wallet Burners

Ever wondered what i do with my commission monies. Yea well, this is what. FFFFF.....i need to keep myself busy with commissions once sem break hits ._.lll These fig companies are milking me dry.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Think tanks.

If you think that Illustration major is all about execution without thought, i want to welcome you to Illustration major to have a go at it. For that matter, not only Illustration major. For the entire art course itself.

Then you can tell me again what you think.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

WDK 9111

My bro's car just got stolen couple of days back, on Sunday. He left his car at his friend's place in Puchong and car pooled to a photoshoot. Next thing he knew, the car was gone when he returned in the afternoon.

It's not a first case though, just a few weeks back his friend whose place he parked at also got his Myvi stolen. Plenty more were also stolen in between the time from that Myvi to my bro's turn. Seems like the police here can't do nuts. Security here has gone to hell.

But anyways, Toyota Corolla SEG only wei. Who would have thought that such an old car also they wanna steal. I dunno whether it is worth their time and effort butchering our car for spare parts to sell. Give problem to us only orz

Now he has to drive mine while i get chauffeured around by my parents to college. Very inconvenient but i will have to live with it for while grrrr. Now they can keep tabs on me when i choose to skip class.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Mocking Bird

Do not mock or condemn the person who make mistakes. Instead think about how you would feel if you were in that position. Learn from the mistakes instead and thank that person for the lesson.


Striving to improve...that is what that has been going on with me since the beginning of this year. I understand not the urgency of it but something clicked within me and suddenly, time passes so fast and it's already July.

Time is something relative, and even in cultural studies we learnt that time can be elastic. It seems to pass by relatively faster when one immerses self in work. Once, i had the experience of having to suffer the loss of my computer for a few days, making it almost impossible for me to do any work. In that duration, time moved so slow that it felt totally awkward to someone like me whose days passes by in the blink of an eye. The day seemed to last longer and i was constantly checking the time at intervals to find that it ticks by so slowly.

Now i'm back into the hectic routine work i do for assignments...hell it feels as if someone is snatching away time from me. I have to sacrifice a lot of sleep to work on personal development and am constantly looking for ways to improve in both creativity and skill.

Why so serious?
Maybe because i feel inadequate to join the industry with my current level. I'm about to graduate in another half a year or so and i feel insecure. I suppose i'm not the first to be thinking in such a way but i can't help it. Just hope for the best i guess and try to lessen that insecurity with preparation, which i think i am trying to now.

It disheartens me a bit to know that before art school, my self study was much more efficient up to a certain level. Without guidance at that time, i had to rely alot of guess work and interpretation to get somewhere with my works. I have freedom of time to slowly analyze and learn from other artists.

Eventually though, i hit a wall and could not proceed further for i was without guidance on 'correct' art concepts. I virtually learnt nothing about art during my schooling days up to high school, simply because the schools i have been never truly emphasized art. So it was quite a handicap there.

"Take out your artblocks class, today we draw gotong-royong".

That was about pointers on how to mix your colors, nothing about the color wheel, nothing about composition, nothing about proportional anatomical studies, nothing about the types of mediums and the techniques to use em. At the end of the day we usually end up doing abstract art pieces which even i wasn't very proud of.

And so, it was really a struggle for me in the first 2 years of being in art college. Everything was so new and raw to me. Especially working the traditional way of color pencils, gauche, acrylics and even using the most basic of tools, the pencil. It was fun but truly stressful moment for me with unfamiliarity of tools since i have been self learning only digitally.

Anyways, i thought that art school would start bringing me into new heights with the right guidance. But sadly, not so in some ways.

As i was saying earlier on, i had more time to do analyzing when i was learning myself. It seems that luxury is no longer possible in art school. Everything i ever get trained on is speed. Speed in meeting deadlines. That way most of the time i took shortcuts and was not truly able understand fully the work that i am assigned with sometimes. It is not wrong since commercial works have harsh demands on speed these days. But i felt that i am learning even less this way. I just wish that the college would lighten up a bit but then that would be another problem in itself again.

i do at times look back at my pre-college works with awe and wonder to myself how i managed to achieve something of that magnitude at that time. Truth be told i hold a higher value to my older stuff although it is lacking in skills and looks fugly. I still feel endeared to them and treasure them like my own children. Maybe because it was the amount of effort i put into them. Although the concepts were not strong and i was lacking in the correct art sense, the process of building it painstakingly might have been the key to its perceived added value. I can easily rebuild something of that same quality or better with 10 times the speed now, but sadly the feeling will be different.

So i ponder to myself sometimes. Was it a right move from my part to bring myself to come to art college? would it have been better to just do self learning, taking a longer time but gaining much more out of it? what would it have been like if i just treated this as a hobby? Questions that might never have answers to them but that is just how it is. Regrets only serve to pull oneself down so i would just have to console myself that this is for the best.

The Road Not Taken. ~Robert Frost

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Colours of Dreams

HELL YEA! The sample pictures of our book has arrived! X.X
I just can't wait to get hold of a copy for myself. In another 2 weeks or so the books will be ready to make its debut in Singapore Cosfest 2010! (if all goes well i hope) I will not be attending Cosfest though and would have to wait for the others to bring it back from Sg.

Enough prattling for now, have a look at the samples :D

I'm quite excited coz this is the first time having my stuff along with my gang's printed in a book! I guess this is the only thing i might be looking forward to in a while.....

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Fantasy Earth Zero Contest

Joined another contest on deviantart. Supposed to do a rendition of our own version of either warrior, mage or scout. I chose scout at 1st but gave up and went for warrior instead. So here's some progress of what i did to the final product.

Did some rough sketches and silhouette study to find a suitable one for me to work on. i wanted an interesting silhouette that will bring out a character more, so i chose the bottom right one. Eventually i combined other stuff together from all that mess to the base i chose. I can already hear ringing words from my lecturer that i need to do more but time is not on my side and i am loaded with college assignments as well. This is the best i could do for now.

Next comes the weapon. I researched a bit on the skill list tree of the warrior class for the game. Then i came up with a weapon that could use ALL skills. We have the single handed weapon and shield skills followed by smashing skills for double handed wielders. As usual my preference of weapons usually end up with hammers. So keeping the hammer in mind, i created a gauntlet/shield that acts as defence and offence at the same time should the warrior wanted to do hand to hand. Think God of War gauntlets of Zeus. Then a hammer would still need a long haft, so a spear it is. And one that could combine with the shield gauntlet thingy to make it a hammer. There you go, best of both worlds for the skill tree.

The initial rough stage...the theme for my armor is 'Hawk'. The hammer looked weird at this point but i couldn't be bothered to fix it at that time. Assignments first.

Later i whipped up a more solid looking hammer head and tested it on the arm that was to wear it as well.

Confirmed the outline at this point and worked on the basic color feel i would want for the overall.

The very initial color base without the shine works yet. The armor still needs some polishing for that extra glow.

The red skirt-cloak was feeling a bit too monotone and making it seem lacking in contrast and boring. So i tweaked a dark blue tone to it instead and found it more satisfactory. Polished the armor a bit to have that oooo-so-shiny effect.

Fun facts
- After completion, i notice that the colors are very Ragnarok Online-ish. I might have been subconsciously doing a color scheme close to theirs. Coz that was the very 1st mmorpg that i loved very much.

- As if the color scheme wasn't a blow enough, many pointed out that this looked something like the paladin class of Ragnarok Online. Ok...must be the blue i made myself change to. Wait does that mean it would be a Lord Knight class if i left it red instead? ARGGGH FAIL IS ME!

- So yea because i wanted to do hawkish stuff, i ended up with a chocobo head for the hammer head. I totally did not intend for it to be chocobo related and reffed off a real hawk's features. To tell the truth i kinda despise FF.

-The earlier hammer head ended up looking like it came out of Card Captor Sakura xD not intended as well. But rofl, really looks like that wand Sakura carries about capturing cards.


Fat chance of winning for this, but just gain more experience joining these competitions. ;_; i wished that i could draw more for the contest. But i'm so time tied this sem that i wanna go jump off some building.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Don't Say Lazy

Sadly this is not an article about K-on! but only borrowing the title of the song for my entry title.

Another day, another week, another month, another sem. We as students never cease to piss our lecturers off, just to be fair about how they mess with our lives too. Today, like any other day of the week we get constant slapping to the face on how much we really suck.

Recap on some of the finer points we heard today from our lecturer.

"You guys are too lazy, never listen to what i say and love to do/repeat mistakes"
i would avoid it too if i had such strong art sense to know how to...

"90% of the pile of works here can be trashed into the bin"
at least my work can help fill up the bin for the trash lady to take out...

"The good ones must have gone to other majors like multimedia or others and left the remaining in Illustration"

"Only once in 10 years we get a special case"
Looks like we can strike out our batch for this...

"Illustration major is a master in everything (drawing related)"
Come to think of it we must be architects when we need to, fashion designer when we need to, hairstylist when we need to, mecha artist when we need to....*list goes on*

"Illustration is hard to get jobs, because you are not what the industry wants. You graduate but your art sense is not there."
D: i think i'll go be a programmer...

I'm beginning to feel that it is true what my brother tells me sometimes. If you're not talented in some ways this whole art deal is a real torture to the common art-tart wannabes. Be it you have talent in execution, talent in hard work, talent in enduring verbal abuse, etc. We must at least possess one of those traits to survive in a more bearable state. Screw the "you can be like this level too without being talented but through working 10 times harder than the talented person next to you". So yea, you work 10 times harder just to be barely able to keep up, and let's just say that next talented dood just puts in a little effort, and VOILA! you go "wth have i been doing..."

You'll end up disillusioned at some point at why DA FARK you can't get to do anything right no matter how much more you put in than the regular Joe. Nevermind you think, just put in more effort. Devote your life, devote every waking second of your time and focus into it. And still the results are bare minimal. Something is really not right here...the word 'SUCK' must really be written somewhere on your body and sapping all your goodness away.

Let's just say you choose to continue in that pattern and push on despite not seeing any visible improvements yet. You ignore the fact that you have to sacrifice more to get by. Then comes along the weekly bombardment of nuclear bombs that goes off with radiation that contains the 'SUCK' ions. Shit hits the fan at this point...the feeling gets worst that all this while what you have been doing is for nothing.

That's where you are given one of the choices in life which will determine your outcome. Take the easy way, just forsake this hot pot for the frying pan and hope for the best in future.


Do it the tough guy way as the saying goes "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going". I'm sure if you are familiar with Benjamin (China dood) you would know how he toughed it out and walked through all the shit and 'SUCK' radiation. He was told that he will never make it with his works and now? who's having the last laugh when he's making a name for himself?

So at the end of the day, morales might run low and you might be covered full with shit (from the spinning fan earlier). But don't give up yet coz everyone in the same room is covered in shit as you are. Go use that shit, fertilize some flowers, smell those flowers and get that ass working again.

I need this entry for my own sake more than anyone else...