Monday, December 21, 2009


Heh as expected of myself. I barely visit my own blog during the breaks when i have almost nothing to rant about. So i'll just write down what pops into my mind right now.

The Kai-ism definition of Friendship.

Friendship is only a thing of circumstances. Because i need to meet you often, i have to get along with you only for my own benefits, and vice versa. Out of sight, out of mind.


Best friends exists only because there is something you want off each other. For example similar interests bonds a pair of best friends together. What both of them are looking for is close companionship whereby anything can be discussed openly, again for one's own benefit of killing boredom or just having an outlet for rants.

So what happens when both of them ceases to meet up that often because of the paths they chose?

The gap widens and they get drifted apart further and further away. Things of the past will just be for memory's sake and life goes on. Meeting again in the future will somehow be different. The bond shared will not be as close as it used to be, but using the lame excuse of "for old times sake" it will try to be revived.

Personally, friendship is a temporary thing to me. I used to treasure it so much that i never thought of losing the best friends i used to have. But as i grew up the harsh realities of life made me realize that 'friendship' is over-rated. I keep seeing stuff like 'Friends Forever' and the likes, which are all very fake and superficial to me. I won't disagree with you if you believe in it but to me it just rubs me the wrong way. The camaraderie-hood only lasts as long as the time we spend together.

I'll never do anything so pointless as to sacrifice myself for a best friend's sake. Everything i do, i have a reason to think about how it would be beneficial to me in the long run. If you speak about brotherhood and stuff like that i don't even believe in it. Your not even blood-related to me. I might only do it for an actual person related to me. You can tell me about how close we used to be, but that is that. Now is now. If there is any reason to help you it is in my own interests. Arms length.

How about old acquaintances i meet accidentally on the streets? Well, i still need to don on the cloak of "friendship" to keep things rolling. So i'll just wave and maybe do some small talk. Who knows i might need to deal with them again later in life, be it at a new workplace or environment.

So, that is the general idea of how i perceive friendship. Sad you might think, about this poor fool named kai which has such a bleak outlook of life as to condemn the notion friendship. No fool i am, just a realistic person very down to earth and tries not to be governed by emotions. Strong emotions do nothing for you but tie you down to attachments of worldly affairs.

Of course, things of theories are always idealistic. That is what i believe in, yet there are always exceptions to it because i am still a human and not a mechanical device. I am happy living as a one man island. But the world now is such that i would need to forge temporary friendships in order to survive. At some point i would still need your help, and you, mine.

More bluntly, i need to use you and you need to use me too.


  1. It is the memorable change you did to someone who would consider you a true friend albeit distance drawn you apart.

    True that "then is then, now is now", but it is what you did that made what is then last until now.

  2. kai u know what, true friends dont necessary always be 24/7 but they do exist when u need them the most.
    Cheers buddy ;)