Happiness

Happiness...i think it has been quite a while since i really felt true happiness. i am content and happy with life the way it is now, but not quite the kind of "WOOHOOO I'M SO HAPPY MY ENDORPHINS ARE OVERFLOWING!!!!!1111 PEACE!!!" -orgasmic kind of happiness. i have great difficulty recalling when was the last time i really felt that way.

Closest i get to this feeling is of when i have achieved a goal or target i personally imposed on myself. But still not quite there yet. Even after i received some pretty good news that i was looking forward to for this whole year, i wasn't even near that level of elated-ness. (i'll disclose what this particular event is after some stuff has been finalized)

So, yea. Is this part of the process of growing up? Little little things that can make you go hyper previously just makes you go meh now. I'm not exactly an uncle or grandpa yet to say that i have seen it all, but basically my outlook on life is pretty neutral at this stage. Nothing to look forward to, just going with the flow kind of thing.

Maybe this will all change when i find my other half, but i'm not lamenting on the absence of it. In fact i'm pretty comfy the way i am now. Still, i guess i'll never know how far i can go by finding that other half. Think i'll just let things be and go with the wind.