Kai-ism

Time and again

2012-02-03T02:00:00.005+08:00

Whoa it's already been about 3 years since the existence of this blog. Time flies when i'm busy not noticing it. Looking back, i sometimes ponder to myself how much have i changed since those embarrassing entrees. Years down the road from now, i might still be thinking the same. Guess this is part of growth again.

Time to time, i feel like putting in an entree for this blog, but always tend to procrastinate it because it felt cumbersome to log into this account. (I was permanently logged into my youtube account, and this blog was on a diff account...) But then since i utilize 2 web browsers these days, i thought why not log in permanently for the other browser.

Hence, a feeble attempt right now to resuscitate this sad sad forgotten corner of the internetz. This blog's purpose has changed over the passing of moons, from WIP step-by-step entrees to personal diary, and then to rants & whines, and back to dumping some doodles occasionally when i feel like it. I'm not so sure what sort of whim and fancies will pop up now that i have decided to revive this redundant space. Maybe a short update on what i have been up to in the duration of MIA.

Hopefully though, i have less of an excuse to not drop entrees now that i have gotten rid of the cumbersome log in problem.

Disillusioned

2011-12-04T01:09:00.000+08:00

Yea...need to move on.

Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

It's Hammertime!

2011-11-18T01:55:00.004+08:00

Moar doodlessss. Feel like wanna finish this one up.

Shit...everytime i finish a doodle i feel like collapsing. Off to bed.

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Unrelated, i found out yesterday that my driving license expired for about 8 months and i just realized it then. Instantly, ran my guts out to renew it.

lucky.

Scribble Dribble

2011-11-17T01:34:00.001+08:00

More junk.
Nodding off while typing this...
Nite nite.

Scribble Dribble

2011-11-16T02:08:00.002+08:00

Qwuick doodle.
Just forcing myself to do something before i hit the sack.
Nite nite.

Ni Hao

2011-11-15T21:57:00.003+08:00

Mandarin...

Hell...it's like a staple here everyday...
Think i've spoken enough of it to make up for the lost time in my past.

Less stuttering, but still... my mind works faster than my mouth these days.
Gotta brush up my speaking skillz.

Zai Jian.

AFA 111111

2011-11-14T18:09:00.002+08:00

Came home mighty stoned from this event.

3D hologram projection Miku concert really happened on 11/11/11 so i'm pretty sore i didn't get a chance to attend it. Oh well, at least waters are tested and i'll try to make it next year.

Pretty meh this year's event. Either the event is getting boring, or i'm just losing touch in becoming an otaku. Is this how growing up will be?? orzll

Anyways, hoppefully i'll post some photos of cosplayers soon.

wert?

2011-11-10T23:11:00.001+08:00

80% of friend blogs i follow...are inactive. Wtfisherman's friend???

Is this a sign?

Senjougahara Fascination

2011-11-06T03:16:00.003+08:00

Still am fascinated.
Just gotta love Tsundere-chan.

Halloween 2011

2011-10-31T00:37:00.001+08:00

FFFFFFFFFF~~~~~~ *f face*
I might not make it in time this year orzlll

Rusty Gears

2011-09-18T23:55:00.003+08:00

Slowly building up momentum...but still not at my peak yet.
Pretty slow year for me.
I miss sitting in my room for extremely long periods of time.

Happy Birthday Miku!

2011-08-31T22:58:00.003+08:00

ありがとうカイ様～❤

I've been pimping this everywhere for the past hour. From facebook to pixiv to deviantart. Regardless, it's still good to let the world be aware of my waifu's birthday. It's her 4th celebration this year.

Happy Birthday Dear Miku!

Perfect Cherry Blossom

2011-08-26T21:07:00.002+08:00

ima chargin' my lazers.....

Something i have been trying to work on whenever i can lately. Another project with my Surface gang to come up with another Touhou fanbook.

Gained Some, But Lost More...

2011-08-04T00:37:00.001+08:00

Posts are getting shorter that this feels more like tweets...

A New Beginning

2011-07-11T00:44:00.004+08:00

2 months since my last update. I've been catching up with lost time after all these years. Finally managed to catch a breather. Doing the most mundane of things these days are superbly satisfying. Spending quality time with family, catching up with friends, reading, that occasional light gaming moment, etc. I'm no longer so bound by time that I have to worry over every second lost which draws me closer to my impending doom of deadlines.

It feels good to be among the living again...

...only regret is that my drive to produce new works has waned with the passing of my education. I would have to seek out my inner lover again.

Transition

2011-05-08T17:38:00.002+08:00

Dead. Dead. Dead.
Almost...

...this blog that is.

-------------------------

Going through some turning points in life now. I will start updating more often again when I have finally settled down. Haven't been drawing as often as I used to lately ^^

Of Tits and Tats

2011-03-16T23:05:00.008+08:00

What have i been doing these days? Does the screenshot above ring a bell to anyone? The very first MMORPG ever made and i still love up to today.

If you still have no clue, this is Ragnarok Online. Albeit, i'm playing on a private server now. The endless joys i had with it when i was in my final years of high schooling. It's a dejavu that i'm doing it again on my final semester of art college. Only difference is i'm playing it with guilt of time wasting this round compared to my previous happy carefree days.

So yea, on my last semester of education almost everytime, without fail i will suddenly loosen up and try to make the best of the time i have left. It might be my survival instincts kicking in knowing that i would not have another chance to do it anymore. I'm not sure if it's the wisest thing to do but so far i've not regretted doing so yet.

On an unrelated note, Puella Magi Madoka Magica anime is really something. It breathes a refreshing uniqueness to it that Studio Shaft seems to always impress me with. If i ever have a chance, i would like to work with those guys down at that studio to know what crack they're smoking to achieve such ingenuity.

2 months to go before i graduate again. This has been the most bittersweet journey of 3 years that i have ever experienced and i'm facing it with mixed feelings. Regardless, every moment of it is a blessing in disguise that i would one day look back and say a great thank you to.

PS: Oh and a little prayer to the catastrophe that struck Japan recently. I hope the radiation problem there can be dealt with swiftly T_T

Awakening

2011-03-01T01:35:00.005+08:00

Lecturer LW once said that he truly picked up a certain set of skills about a year after he first learned it. He told us to bid our time and we will eventually come to see fruit too. I am finally able to relate to what he meant then, as I too, am beginning to familiarize with those skills although i have not touched it for ages. I guess as I went along i must have polished it without knowing it and eventually came to a sudden realization to its application. I am far from mastery but at least I am grasping it. Ancora Imparo - I am still learning.

Signing off with a quick 30 mins doodle of Hakutaku Keine from Touhou.

GUYS!

2011-02-24T01:46:00.003+08:00

Just a random update as realization dawned upon me that I have not drawn any personal works of guys for the whole of last year. Assignments yes but not very proud of those. The last time I did, was the picture below which was a commission i completed on April of 2009.

halo thar...i got a wooden stick and i'm not afraid to use it.

*shrugs*
Oh well. It's always easier to draw guys for me than to draw girls so I rarely practice drawing any guys. I wonder if i still can pull one bishie off now ahahaha. Should be updating my blog my frequently from this point on. Until next!

Thirst

2011-02-09T01:11:00.003+08:00

There's this very strong urge from me lately to draw a lot of my own personal works. It feels like i'm on heat and i'm having an overflow of vigor to want to do it. I think i found some breakthroughs and would really like to practice on it to move on to the next level. I have been stuck and frustrated for a while now, having my skills stay stagnant and unable to proceed further. But now when i finally found the light at the end of the tunnel, i am unable to dash towards it. Pity i can't, because i'm crippled and tied down from procrastinating my assignments for too long.

Why not use this energy on my assignments instead you ask?

Sadly the same cannot be said for my motivation to work on my assignments. I'm so sick of seeing the same assignment for 2 semesters in a row that i just want to get it done with and dump it away. This system of bringing over work from the previous sem is flawed, either that or i'm just not interested in it.

What really keeps me going now are those few joyful moments when i slot in my own interests. It has been years since i last had an artblock and i'm really thankful for it. But that might also be my bane since i wont ever want to take a break.

Happy Year of Rabbit!

2011-02-04T19:22:00.004+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year to all the folks celebrating it ^^

Panda looks so at home with those ears...

Nothing much to write about lately except that I've been constantly slacking off assignments and doing quite a bit of my own works xD. I keep telling myself that I will do some work today but end up always not doing it. TONIGHT FOR SURE I'M GONNA DO SOME!!!! PROMISE ;A;

Anyways, haven't been posting step-by-steps lately, so here's some.

Draft, don't plan to use outlines for this.

Straight on to the color thumb.

Using a single layer to paint the character. Slowly refining the pic.

Done refining the character.

Fixed up the panda and put in a simple background.

That's all folks. I have something else exciting to write about but can only do so around end of February. Have a great year ahead!

Japan Trip Day 5,6 & 7

2011-01-18T22:36:00.032+08:00

Day 5

Since i mentioned that i fell sick on day 4 of the trip, our plans to Hakone for sight-seeing got cancelled. We decided to do head on to Ikebukuro to do some shopping. My bro forgot his camera battery which was charging back at the dorm, so the only pictures taken there were courtesy of Kar Meng.

Some random park at Ikebukuro whilst we were asking for directions again at conbinis.

Hereon, there are no photos to log our journey sorry ><. We just headed off to Sunshine Mall, took a stroll and checked out Animate + Mandarake. Ikebukuro is known to be the otaku haven for girls, so the stuff that was sold around the shops here are mostly catered to girls. This place had a ton load of BL/yaoi goodies for sale but we found some pretty normal goods to grab at too. After our little otaku hunt, we went for a more normal shopping Mall, Tokyu Hands. They practically had all sorts of funky stuff here for sale, ideal spot for grabbing souvenirs. Top floor of Tokyu Hands building was a pet store with a Nekobukuro (Cat cafe where you can go in and play with the cats for a fee). Unfortunately it was getting late and we couldn't spare time playing with cats. I'll leave you with some night photos of Ikebukuro, on our journey back to the station.

It was time for dinner, and we headed back to Kinshicho to try out an all-you-can-eat cake shop for the price of about 1000+ yen for an hour. The cakes in Japan are really good! It is something everyone must try when paying Japan a visit.

The selection of cakes we were allowed to choose from.

Outside the cake shop.

We had eaten enough for our money's worth but were feeling a bit queasy after so much sweet stuff. Headed back to the dorm and called it a day.

Day 6

Comiket's first day! Truth be told i wasn't really looking forward to this but i had to at least experience what it was like at the biggest convention in Japan. Due to horror stories of long queue lines and packed trains, we took off from the dorm in the afternoon. I'll leave you for a bit to savor the pictures taken on our train ride to Tokyo Big Sight.

Tokyo Big Sight, an awesomely huge place that held the Comiket 79 event.

The crowd around here is pretty sparse at the moment but there were still a lot of people.

We followed the flow of the crowd and wandered around aimlessly into a small portion of the event. Hell by the time realization dawned upon us, we were at the section catered for the women market. Look at the scary line formed almost completely by women.

Otakus are not only limited to guys...

Flowing with the sea of people to head on to the commercial booth areas.

Once we arrived inside the commercial hall, it was so jam-packed with people that everyone was pushing us through. I only lined up for the Pixiv commercial booth to get their artbooks which was a fairly short line of about 30 minutes. Other booths like Nitro+...we couldn't even find the end of the queue after walking for 5 minutes from their booth area.

Look at the crowd...and this was supposedly not the peak hour anymore.

Dolls from the Azone booth i think.

One of the poster girls for a booth that had an ass and boob as their mascot character. She wore something inflated at her rear end to stay true to the mascots.

Another of the poster girls, this one with the boobjob instead of the buttjob.

Booth selling Queen's Blade goodies.

Our meeting point every 30 minutes in case we got separated by the crowd.

The Type-moon booths were closed when we arrived, but hell the whole booth area was hellavu cute.

Art by Koyama Hirokazu i think, one of the lead artists for Type-Moon.

Can you find Neko Arc?

More scary crowd shots.

...And again.

Some big saw deco outside of Tokyo Big Sight. We were on our way back to the station after our little traumatizing experience.

I can't recall where we took these, but it was on one of the changing stations before he headed straight home to our dorm.

After putting off our stuff at the dorm, me and bro headed out to Akiba again to pick up last minute stuff. I went on to invade Toranoana whilst bro went to Yodobashi to take a look around. We went searching for dinner after that but most of the vegetarian restaurants were closed during this time of the year T.T So we took a simple meal of salad, seaweed, and plain porridge back at the dorm.

After dinner, we went for an artificial hot spring which was actually a public bath house that channeled in hot spring water from elsewhere. It was quite an experience to be in our full glory around everyone , but like they say, when in Rome do as the Romans do. That night was actually pretty cold but after the bath, the cold didn't really affect us anymore.

Day 7

Last day, free and easy. Didn't really have anything planned out. Took some pics of K's House after our breakfast to commemorate our stay.

Since it was free and easy, we headed for Asakusa again to pick up last minute souvenirs. We passed by one of Bandai's buildings and are greeted with these cute monuments.

These are just roadside flowers...the flowers here are so perfect-looking that it almost seem artificial.

Here we are at the market street before Sensoji Temple again.

Tried some hot Amazake a.k.a sweet rice wine which was pretty good. Not to mention pretty shopkeepers too.

We returned to the dorm soon after to meet up with the staff of K's House for some photo-shooting session.

The manager of this place has good taste...

With nothing else in mind and the weather being extremely cold on the last day, we strolled to the small temple just next to the dorm.

Our lifeline while we were staying at the dorm.

An outside view of K's House.

It was about time then to head to the airport. After checking in our luggage, we explored the international terminal of Haneda airport.

Wait...are we still in the terminal?

I hope you enjoyed the pictures. The aim of these post are to let you experience like you are personally at the places itself. Of course there are a lot of limitations but hopefully everyone got to enjoy as if you are partially there!

Japan Trip Day 3 & 4

2011-01-16T15:30:00.021+08:00

Day 3

I believe, it was a Sunday when we decided to head down to Akihabara coz Pc told us that it would be much more crowded/interesting/happening/etc. But it just turns out to be crowded and nothing more. Apparently, someone from the K's House dorm told us that a stabbing incident happened before and thus some of the activity present at Akiba has toned down. ;_;

Soooo yea, right out of Akihabara station, we were greeted by the SEGA building. We kept going pass this building but never actually going into it.

Took a left turn from SEGA building and was greeted by this cute information poster along the buildings. I forgot about the content so maybe you can decipher it for yourself xD.

Whoever feels sexy can snap pictures of themselves here.

Pc and his failed attempt at looking moe.

I was looking for an otaku blood donation center featured by Danny Choo before and found it on the 5th floor of one of the buildings.

The entranceway to the said donation center. They were having some Tony Taka theme this round. Pity we weren't really allowed to take a tour within. Only blood donors are allowed to do so and we had a restriction for donating since we are foreigners. So we left with only this shot taken.

One of the alley ways had this promotional poster for Nitro+'s new game.

Back to the main street where all the goodies really are.

We chanced upon this awesome poster of Keima from 'The World God Only Knows'

A whole shelf of eroges :D I forgot where we took a shot of this. We aren't actually allowed to take any shots of stuff in shops but my bro had just acquired the skill 'Ninja Shot' and was happily taking pot luck shots of the said prohibited areas.

One of the more raunchy suggestive promotional posters. These things are everywhere so just you know. It's a very normal thing for them.

There was a sort of event at Akiba Square (photos below) and we were really fortunate to come across this Itasha most probably owned by some big gun of Nitro+.

The cool car was practically plastered with Sonico.

It would be my dream when i have the moolah in future to own a car such as this...

Said event at Akiba Square after the crowd has dispersed later in the afternoon.

Mostly featured booths from ero-game companies if i'm not mistaken. They were selling stuff like dakimakuras, CDs and misc stuff which were mostly gone when we were looking around.

Nippon Ichi Software! The cool doods who did Disgaea series! DOOOOOOOOOD!!!!! They were promoting their latest game here, i think it was called 'Criminal Girls' or something.

We like to break rules, particularly on this signage. A true ninja my bro has turned into.

Ze Animate store (duh)

Tony Taka was having an exhibition of his works at the basement of Toranoana and his latest work, particularly this one is just too awesome to describe. We weren't allowed to take pics again so...yea you know.

A precaution on the staircase of Toranoana to the upper levels of their building where the real good stuffs are.

After getting our otaku fix, we were looking around to try out maid cafes just for the kicks of it. We went for this which was quite a reasonably priced cafe with just ordinary maids with no special settings, since we just burnt our wallets earlier.

I couldn't resist asking my bro to take this shot. It's just too darn cute.

On our way back to the station, lo and behold! GUNDAM CAFE WTFUX??? i wasn't a fan so yeap nothing to see here after my wtf session.

Ready to head back for dinner.

One of the posters at the station.

Day 4

I was feeling a bit tired out after our little Akiba run on day 3. We were supposed to head to Hakone for some hotsprings and Fuji mountain scenery, but decided to go on the 5th day instead to maximize our time there since we wasted quite a bit of time finding stuff out at the station to make it a worthwhile trip anymore. So instead, we went for Washinomiya Shrine. What is so special about this shrine you ask? Read on.

Poster taken at the Washinomiya station. I'm not too sure what the kanji means but visually i think you would know too.

This is what we were here for. Washinomiya is the hometown for the author of Lucky Star and this place was used as reference spots for the anime.

We followed the breadcrumbs to the shrine.

Supposedly before this bridge (or after) was one of the settings used in the anime but we aren't hardcore enough to recognize it.

More breadcrumbs on lamp posts.

Most of the shops we passed by was decorated similarly to this.

We got lost following the crumbs along the way but yea, finally at the gates of the shrine.

Just outside the gate.

Confirmation that we are at the right shrine.

I forgot what these are called but we got to see a load of wishes by other patrons hung here.

I'll leave you to enjoy the architecture here.

Boards hung by Pc and me which can be found at the shrine now before they decide to make more room. Each board costs 1000 yen @.@" i wasn't going to participate but got poisoned along the way to do so too. The temperate here was freezing although there weren't any wind surprisingly. I had a hard time trying to draw with my frozen hands and with a ballpoint pen since Pc stole my Uni pen.

At the end of this trip back at the Washinomiya station, i was gradually falling sick. Halfway back to K's House dorm i was suffering so intensely that i lost control of my tear glands and was shaking uncontrollably. Standing and walking took all of my strength and i couldn't even mutter a word. By the time i was back to the dorm, i was down with a fever.

Fortunately, my bro was around to take care of me and later, Eddie together with his Singaporean mates back at the dorm gave me some medication. I was better the next day but not well enough to make the journey to Hakone ):

Stay tuned for the last 3 days!

Japan Trip Day 1 & 2

2011-01-16T00:25:00.015+08:00

Me, my bro, PC and Kar Meng arrived in Japan at 11.00 pm and almost couldn't make it to our dorms that night. Fortunately we managed a last train ride halfway to our destination and took a cab for the rest of the journey which saved us $$$ for having to take a cab straight from Haneda airport =A=;; Collapsed on the bed upon arrival.

We headed off to Shinjuku on our 1st morning to check out Kinokuniya at Shinjuku. We took our time familiarizing ourselves with the railway system on the 1st day, and we invaded a lot of convenience stores asking for directions. People there are super helpful even though we weren't buying anything xD (which we do feel bad about).

The view directly out of the South exit of Shinjuku station.

Ticketing machines at the South exit.

We somehow ended up lost at the back of Takeshimaya shopping complex.

...And was greeted with the sight of Docomo Tower.

Me and my bro had an 'awesome' lunch of Krispy Kremes nearby where we shot the Tower. There wasn't much of a choice for us since we weren't familiar with the train system here yet to get us elsewhere that has vegetarian restaurants. I'll never forget this meal. The Donuts were @$!@# sweet and due to some mis-communication, i ordered a dozen between me and my bro. Couldn't finish it and brought it back to the dorm later. @o@;;

It was getting dark and looked like it was about to rain at about 5 pm, so we decided to take the train back to Akiba. Spent a couple of hours there scouting around Toranoana and looking around the other shops at the main road. We were going to spend a whole day here on another day so it was just a short visit to kill time. Unfortunately no photos were taken here.

After that little trip, me and my bro split up with the other 2 and decided to brave the odds of looking for our dinner a few stations away, listed on a very helpful book we got.

i almost cried tears of joy when we finally found the place located at Kinshicho, just 2 stations away from Kuramae (where we were staying). We had our first solid hot meal in Japan and it really brightened our spirits after toughening it out for the day. It helped get rid of that donut after-taste we had in the afternoon.

The restaurant owner was a Taiwanese and boy, was i glad that i could finally have a smooth conversation with someone other than my gang. We packed off 2 bentous from that restaurant as a contingency plan for the next day in case we couldn't find food again. The bentou was a taste of heaven *A*

The owner let us take a pic of one of the dishes another table ordered. i'm salivating just by looking at this and remembering the food there ;_;

On to day 2!

Early in the morning, me and bro + Kar Meng who tagged along decided to head off to Sensoji Temple located at Asakusa, just a 20 minute walk north of Kuramae.

Can't help but notice this cool cop at a traffic junction.

Took a pic of a telecommunications tower on our way there.

We reached the market street that stretches out for a bit before reaching the temple. Lots of delicious foodstores, sweets and souvenirs can be found here.

Me and Kar Meng decided to have some soft ice, despite the weather being extremely cold at that time. We were off our knockers. I had sour plum and it was like the best ice cream i had in a while. There's this manner-culture-thingy in Japan though, that we aren't supposed to walk and eat at the same time. So we were asked to finish up at the store itself.

One of the market lanes off the main one. Still too early and most of the stores are still closed.

Getting closer to Sensoji Temple!

Entranceway.

The altar directly after the donation box.

Donation box where we threw in a few some coins, clapped our hands, bow and paid homage/made wishes.

Mikuji, where we get our fortunes on a slip of paper after a donation of 100 yen.

Later in the afternoon headed down with the guys and Eddie to Nakano to meet up with our Japan-based friend Victor. We then eaded off to Nakano Broadway to pick up our Otaku goods. :D

Me and bro found the pioneer of vegetarian restaurants right in this place 16 years ago. It was wonderful!

2nd floor view of Nakano Broadway.

Wow?! There's actually a Games Workshop here that is actually crowded with players unlike some of the places i've been to in Australia.

We happened to pass by a small gallery in one of the floors of Nakano Broadway and took a look around since it was free entry. Stuff here are done in oilpaint and maybe acrylic. The staff took photos of us while we were busying ourselves taking photos of the gallery.

A close up on one of the works i like :)

Mandarake at Nakano Broadway that is so vast as to have things ranging from figures to music cds to artbooks. Most of the stuff are second hand stuffs that are hard to find anymore but they do have new stocks too.

Our living quarters for 4 on the first 3 nights there.

Living area of K's House is always wonderfully lively. Meeting and making friends with people from all parts of the world is part of the joy of staying at budget hostels.

I've been procrastinating far too long to post these pics up...also partially due to post-processing the pics (courtesy of my bro) and our so kind dead internet for a week. Stay tuned for more!

CF2010 & Merry Xmas!

2010-12-23T00:25:00.005+08:00

Let me help you with that ribbon...

Early Christmas greetings coz i will be off very soon.

As promised, photos for both day of CF courtesy of SURFACE's photographer my bro.

Day 1

Day 2

Overall, the event wasn't too bad but the accessibility to it was horrible. We could have died if there was a fire since the only way to get to that floor was via lifts which arrived 15 mins after you press the button.

The crowd wasn't too bad this year round despite all that and the quality of cosplayers locally are on a steady rise.

Ok folks, i've gone to Japan for a week and will be un-contactable.

mini minor updates

2010-12-20T02:27:00.002+08:00

Watched TRON Legacy on Saturday and i took a walk down memory lane. Loved it much and i wanna get so inspired by it. Simplistic design using neon-lighted body suits. How awesome is that.

Attended Comic Fiesta during the weekend and will soon put up links to event photographs courtesy of SURFACE's photographer, my bro.

Will be in Japan for a week starting 23rd of this month till the 31st. i'll be totally unreachable during that extent so please take note buddies.

busy preparing and planning for the trip now, cya.

Give me the Green Light

2010-11-22T18:09:00.003+08:00

Remember a couple of posts back i said something about having good news to disclose? i have been given the green light to make it known now.

http://ameblo.jp/hobino/entry-10711954132.html

My name is listed around the 15th from the bottom

Cu.eL (Shaman)

Yup, i managed to get selected to have my work featured for Otacool 4 Worldwide Illustrators! *A* As far as i know there's another Malaysian in that book, which is no other than SURFACE group leader Pcmaniac88 who even got selected for prize awards to which he won lightsaber chopsticks...bastard...

Guess it has been a good and fulfilling tiger year.

i'm ready to go right now~
i'm ready to go right now~

Oh What's New?

2010-11-11T23:14:00.004+08:00

We failed to live up to the expectations of being the ideal good 3rd years to our lects and tutors again. We will be jobless and no company will hire us for our awesome suckiness in skill and attitude!

It's a good semester...

Happy Halloween!!!

2010-10-31T01:13:00.006+08:00

Happy Cuelloween! i want to be the lollipop (*´Д`) =3 -3 =3

Happy Halloween peepz.

Nothing much to be happy about though. We don't celebrate it much here hmm? definitely coz its origins are western so yeah. The Celtic equivalent of version of Hungry Ghost Festival or something.

Still, i have always enjoyed myself for this Festive and still will for some time to go. I think i mentioned this before so i'll spare you the details.

Anyways, enjoy my annual 'pumpkin' carving session.

1. Select a fresh pumpkin in a shape that pleases me.

2. Mark the necessaries in preparation of carving.

3. Cut off the top and start scooping the stuff outta the pumpkin.

4. Follow the pattern made earlier as i cut my way through the pumpkin.

5. Remove the cut outs and do further refining to the pumpkin.

6. Place the lighting inside the pumpkin to create an eerie glow.

Adios while i show off my newly carved pumpkin.
You can carve your own pumpkins too!

Happiness

2010-10-14T13:47:00.003+08:00

Happiness...i think it has been quite a while since i really felt true happiness. i am content and happy with life the way it is now, but not quite the kind of "WOOHOOO I'M SO HAPPY MY ENDORPHINS ARE OVERFLOWING!!!!!1111 PEACE!!!" -orgasmic kind of happiness. i have great difficulty recalling when was the last time i really felt that way.

Closest i get to this feeling is of when i have achieved a goal or target i personally imposed on myself. But still not quite there yet. Even after i received some pretty good news that i was looking forward to for this whole year, i wasn't even near that level of elated-ness. (i'll disclose what this particular event is after some stuff has been finalized)

So, yea. Is this part of the process of growing up? Little little things that can make you go hyper previously just makes you go meh now. I'm not exactly an uncle or grandpa yet to say that i have seen it all, but basically my outlook on life is pretty neutral at this stage. Nothing to look forward to, just going with the flow kind of thing.

Maybe this will all change when i find my other half, but i'm not lamenting on the absence of it. In fact i'm pretty comfy the way i am now. Still, i guess i'll never know how far i can go by finding that other half. Think i'll just let things be and go with the wind.

World number 1 Pest

2010-10-06T21:17:00.009+08:00

When we entered the new millennium, humans have begun evolving at exponential rates, especially technologically. We aren't the only species to do so though. Silently, some organisms of this world have slowly begun evolving too.

And out of those...there is one that has caused us great suffering. One that has evolved to bring a whole new meaning to the term 'annoying'.

Mosquitoes...

It is to my believes that mosquitoes have evolved to be able to sense brain waves of it's potential killer-wannabes. Over the many generations of their fore fathers that ended up being flattened or poisoned, they have honed their survival skills to the highest form of sensing killing intent. Or your stares. Or even your thoughts of wanting to search them out. More familiarly known to us as "spider sense".

And from this belief, i came to derive a categorization of the new breed of mosquitoes that has been identified for now.

The Common Mosquito
----------------------------
Numbered are the days of this dumb breed of mosquitoes that have "SMACK ME" written all over their tiny bodies. Count your blessings if you ever encounter any of this type as it is rare indeed.

Traits: Slow fliers. Is always in plain sight. Slow in reacting.

Danger level: Lowest

Difficulty level: Lowest

The Kamikaze Samurai
----------------------------
You sure as hell better wish you spot this one quick and get rid of it before these little pesky warriors end up dealing A LOT OF DAMAGE before committing suicide in the fan or escaping; Depending on when they are discovered. This breed ignores all external forces and aims to only to deal the most amount of annoyance to you. They laugh at the face of danger. No amount of wind or leg-shakes will deter these blood thirsty bastards. They cling so hard to you that you can huff and puff at them to no avail. Good thing about that is that they are quite easy to kill once spotted. Also, makes sloppy escape attempts to dark places. Once found, easily disposed off due to sluggishness after the attacks.

Traits: Sticks to you like a magnet. More movement from you = more hits from them. Earth, storm and fire is no deterrent.

Danger level: Medium

Difficulty level: Easy

The Resistance Fighter
----------------------------
These mofos ignore the use of mosquito coils and the likes. No amount of poison will stop them in their tracks. Very annoying once you lure yourself into the false security of setting up your safety parameters only to have it useless in the face of these shits. Changing to another brand of mosquito repellent helps slow them down for a couple of days. Will usually strike when you are sleeping after setting up your parameters.

Traits: Highly resistant to mosquito coils. Speed might be lowered with use of mosquito coils.

Danger level: Medium

Difficulty level: Tough

The Ninja
------------
True to the art of ninjutsu, you practically almost can't spot these @$HOLES! Now you see them, *blinks* now you don't. They are one with the shadows. Any terrain is useful to them as camouflage. They have also honed their senses to the highest level and is the most sensitive among the others towards brainwaves. You swear that you are looking at your legs the whole time, and still fail to notice them stinging you where everything is in plain sight. They can bend light around them to completely mask their presence. They can annoy you the whole night and still get away with it only to annoy you again the next day. Only time you can catch them off guard is during the day, if you know where to look for them.

Traits: Extremely hard to spot. Has the highest mind reading abilities.

Danger level: Shit hits the fan.

Difficulty level: You are better off giving up and conserving energy than hunting them.

The Pack Wolves
---------------------
Sonofabi- this one takes the cake. They swarm over you in not less than 5 (usually more) and confuses you in an attempt to focus on any one of them. Chances are you'll be flinging away trying to get rid of this deadly swarm than to target any single unit for killing. By the time you've scattered them away, they've already landed a few bites on you. Once split, they will fall into their own sub categories of those mentioned above.

Traits: Pack mentality to overwhelm you. Difficult to shake off.

Danger level: An addition or multiple of the danger levels the pack consists of.

Difficulty level: OH SHI-

The Illusionist
------------------
The imaginary mosquitoes. They are REALLY not there but it's just you...becoming phobic and feels like there is something fluttering in between the crevices and contours of your body. Appears when you have been annoyed for far too long and your tolerance threshold has been breached.

Traits: You feel something touching the hairs of your body. You imagine mosquitoes lurking in the shadows.

Danger level: You've gone mental.

Difficulty level: Takes a few days of mosquito free environment to heal.

*all types possess a certain amount of brainwave reading, except for maybe the common mosquito that existed way before the millennium.

Down with It

2010-09-30T21:18:00.006+08:00

An accumulation of things this past week, has finally made my body succumb to the forces of nature.

Been shifting things in and out of me and my bro's room to get our floor tiles fixed. Had some problems with the tiles turning loose after we moved in for a year plus. Had to forebear a few months of having creaking tiles like the traps of Prince of Persia game.

And finally, just last week contractors came over to get the tiles fixed. I think i inhaled a year's supply of dust that has left my nose swollen and dripping on a daily basis. Shifting furniture in and out of the rooms were the worst part of the whole fiasco.

While typing this blog entry, i am on my 4th day of camping in my brother's room. His was the smaller one and so had it fixed before mine. And i was rejoicing that i would have mine back tonight after some shifting of furniture back in. (thanx bro for putting up with a shitty room mate that messes up your room further and whines like no tomorrow)

But gawd damn contractors failed to show up today to do the finishing touches. THEY JUST NEEDED TO PAINT THE DAMN FINISHING ON THE WALLS. ANGRY KAI IS ANGRY -_-

Another day lost...now i would most probably have to spend my weekends this week like the last, to move stuff back in and reorganize my room. I'm seriously lagging behind in college works thanks to this. I'm barely getting by with the half-assed works i've been showing. Not to mention it is already hard as it is to get my arse motivated.

Thanx to all that flaming anger, i burnt myself out today and fell sick. Sweet.

On a happier note, new chapter of One Piece is gonna be up soon in a couple of hours.

Menkui

2010-09-18T00:21:00.007+08:00

Menkui = the japanese word for being superficial/ attracted by physical looks only.

Yep, that's me at this stage. Nothing else matters as long as there's eye candy.

Don't wanna dwell on having concepts for everything. i just wanna have fun and enjoy doing what i love with no restrictions. It's ok to just ignore all else sometimes.

more WIP for the next OTACOOL entry.

my shaman character did years back

Roses are blue, Violets are violet

2010-09-15T16:02:00.002+08:00

With some requests from friends on how i draw my roses. Once you get the idea behind it it's not so hard after all. Oh and this is only a generic rose. There are so many kinds of roses out there and each unique to itself. But fundamentally, this can be applied to most (i think)

So, here you go folks.

IT IS SO HARD!

2010-09-14T00:02:00.003+08:00

...to start anything at all.

FFFFFFFFFFF...i'm practically forcing myself to do a lot of things. Forcing myself to work on assignments, to update this blog and to finish off the work about to be featured below.

Ugh?

Could it be i have finally mastered trying to take things easy? i know i should be worried about being so slack but i ain't! My fears and stress of not doing any work has just evaporated into thin air. The logical part of my brains are sensing impending doom so it's actually helping and forcing me along in survival. If not for it i guess i wouldn't have done anything at all.

Anyways, enough of that. I just hope it's a phase i'm experiencing after taking a short break. So yea i'm busy joining competitions again and trying to at least make it into one of em to mark this as a successful year. No loss tho if i don't make it coz it's really pushing me to keep producing.

Here's the latest piece i did to try to end up representing Malaysia in OTACOOL
Step-by-step:

drafted the rough in my warped-by-water sketchbook

scanned it and fixed up some parts

the outline stage

a rough color rendition of what i would want for the end results

i always work on the character first

watdefisherman'sfriend?
what just happened between the previous step and this?
i totally scrapped the shitty background i came out with in the rough. Have no idea how i thought it looked ok at that time.

Final touches to the character and background before cropping up the pic for a tighter composition.

Damn...i'm so not used to coloring in light tones anymore. Coloring dark pictures have screwed up my sense of depth quite a bit. For example, the pic below, which was the first entry for the same competition.

i hope to be able to work on a 3rd piece. Futile it might be but hey, i can't give up on a competition that demands for original characters can i? my own stuff especially...never felt happier joining.

Happy Birthday Miku

2010-09-01T03:21:00.001+08:00

31st August

3 years old nao...♡ (´・ω・｀)

Momentum

2010-08-30T19:05:00.004+08:00

wip of my submission for Otacool contest.

*sighs*

Momentum is uberly important to me when i need a kick start to work on something. Before my sem break started i was superbly over-excited in getting to do my own stuff. Due to the constant momentum of having to deal with my assignments, my drive did not waver. But 2 weeks have passed since then and i'm already in my final week of break.

I sort of regretted going for that Penang trip....it totally threw me off the mood to draw when i got home. Worst still my computer problem resurfaced and i had to spend a couple of days fixing it into working conditions again. I just got it repaired (i hope) and by now i'm already almost out of steam. Guess i just have to make the most out of it. Now i wouldn't be able to spam submit the Otacool competition i was planning to join.

Again...i'm not ready to face the next semester...things are moving a little wee too fast for my liking here.

Oh by the way, Muramasa: The Demon Blade is fun <3

Up there

2010-08-22T00:19:00.003+08:00

時々、ここは寂しいなあ．．．

Penang

2010-08-17T18:29:00.001+08:00

Going to Penang for roughly 3 days. Starting tomorrow back on Friday. In case for those wondering where i've gone to for the next few days.

BREAK!!!!

2010-08-16T23:20:00.007+08:00

HELL YEA!!!! I HAVE NEVER LOOKED FORWARD TO A BREAK SO BADLY AS THIS ROUND. I'M GONNA RECUPERATE AS MUCH AS I CAN BEFORE THE NEXT ONSLAUGHT.

----------------------------------

i'm learning to take things easy this round. Won't be handling commissions. Take my time doing some personal works. Daily sketching and self exploration. Gaming non stop and catching up on lost time on movies, animes & mangas. i lost my internet connection for roughly a couple of days and found that time passed by so slowly that i had ample time to do the things i liked. It's good to feel the slow pace of things again once in a while. i just totally dumped the whole workaholic mentally for the extent of this break.

i noticed now that i have urges to do more traditional works lately. Watercolor in particular. After all the enthusiasm of going purely digital now i find myself reverting to getting dirty on pencil and paper. Human nature again to long to do something that you don't have the privilege of doing anymore. It's funny how we always contradict ourselves.

Speaking of contradictions, i'm a walking contradiction myself. Like i mentioned before, way back when i was still in my teens i used to be prejudice towards stuff like gothic lolita and now i'm finding myself gaga over it. i also used to hate the color green but thanx to a certain vocaloid, i have learnt to find beauty in that color as well. It's hard to name my favorite color now if you ask me about it.

i think my strongest point in art lies in colors. Ever since it started from a hobby, i was very particular about the colors i used. So now with no particular special preference for a certain color, i find myself having a lot of fun and freedom exploring with color combinations that bring out a certain mood or impact to a picture. i'm far from perfection though, even if i perceive it to be my forte. Regardless, i just want to have fun while doing what i love best.

*ahem*
i strayed from what i really wanted to say. Anyways, back to contradictions. i think what is important is that we learn to figure out which is the side of contradictions that would help elevate us into another level. Sometimes we remain rigid about it being our 'personality' or 'habit' which defines us. Maybe due to our ego or just part of us that wishes to not change, we sometimes end up shutting ourselves up in the bad end of it. And so we stop our own growth in that aspect.

i self-reflect whenever i can and found that i have changed quite a bit over the years. i try to correct some quirks within myself to some success, while picking up other idiosyncrasies along the way. It's almost an endless loop, but that's what makes us a little bit better each time we try to confront it.

i have this feeling that i might have just turned more eccentric and twisted within my own world. But that's just me. You be the judge.

i'll end off with some step-by-steps of what i've been up to.

rough sketch

color thumb

initial base and touchup

further refinement

preliminary textures

more texture spam and final result

Based off this video and song. i endlessly looped it while working on it to get into the mood. i enjoy drawing something of this genre but i can't do it all the time as it creeps me out while i'm on it. The creepier i make it the more scared i make myself. Yes i am afraid of ghosts and horrors ._.

Computer Problems Pt. 3

2010-08-04T23:55:00.003+08:00

Part 3 i think....since i started this blog

Give me just another week...i need to finish up my finals before you kaput.

i am never spared from computer break downs every sem. Without fail.

i seem to have a running curse with computers. My old one kept giving me hardware failures. MY NEW ONE IS STARTING TO DO THE SAME. and its barely 2 years old...what am i doing wrong -_-

i think without the help of my bro i would have given up long ago and changed like 2-3 new computers within the span of 3 years, 1 for each year. He wasted as much time (if not more) than me trying to troubleshoot the shittiest problems i always face with my computers. What would i do without him D:

This is why i hate hardware and just get by with the bare minimal knowledge of running and troubleshooting this hunk of metal.

aih. so sick of this i barely have the mood to do my work now. Back-upping as much important stuff as i can right now while i'm typing this. Screw digi illust finals for now.

Nothing ruins my mood more than computer problems. Life sucks when you know you have to depend on something unreliable to get past your life.

Repetition -> Habit

2010-08-02T19:56:00.006+08:00

"I wake up in the morning with nothing, at the end of the day i have something" ~Christian Lorenz (Swiss artist)

That quote best describes the passion we as artists have very well. Each day we create something new and it satisfies us at the end of it. I used to think that it was a chore to draw daily and would only like to do it whenever i felt like it. That was at a time long past when i hadn't really delved myself into art college.

Although i still loathe working on my assignments at a non-stop basis, at the end of the day there is that certain satisfaction of accomplishment. In between those hectic moments i feel even more joy on having to work on my own stuff. Ever more so desperately now with the limited moments of actually not having to fulfill a deadline.

I've really become a workaholic. I feel fidgety if for a day i did not put something down on pencil and paper. I'll end up sleeping that night feeling guilt and remorse for having done nothing productive. It's quite hard to take it easy but at least i have started to learn how to minimize my stress levels when necessary.

On another note, art block is hard to come by these days as i always do have something i would wanna do. Sure squeezing out ideas for assignments ain't always a walk in park but it gets easier and easier with familiarity. As for personal works, i have too much on my mind to really get any art block. Just that i lack the time to create those pieces i have stored somewhere in the parts of my brain that aren't filled with ~~porn~~ nonsensical whims.

Anyways, i have been getting myself involved in quite a few competitions this sem. I'm quite surprised to find out that i didn't suffer burnout as badly as the previous sems. It seems that the more i do works for myself, the more energized i would be for a while. It keeps me happy although i know i might be sacrificing much of my time for sleep, play, and etc. I even concentrate and work faster on my assignments after that -_-;;

Oh well, signing off for now. Bz bz bz with life that i don't update this place as much as i would love to. Ranting about negative stuff would be easy but this would just make my blog a gloomy place to drop by. I'll also end up sounding like a whiny biatch. Sooooo yea. Lately it's turning out to be more like a diary for myself.

Have some random quicky of my mascot girl here while i go back to living my sad existence. Abusing textures and using colors i seldom use is fun.

Dat ass...

Upcoming Wallet Burners

2010-07-26T01:18:00.003+08:00

Ever wondered what i do with my commission monies. Yea well, this is what. FFFFF.....i need to keep myself busy with commissions once sem break hits ._.lll These fig companies are milking me dry.

Think tanks.

2010-07-21T21:19:00.005+08:00

If you think that Illustration major is all about execution without thought, i want to welcome you to Illustration major to have a go at it. For that matter, not only Illustration major. For the entire art course itself.

Then you can tell me again what you think.

WDK 9111

2010-07-06T02:57:00.007+08:00

My bro's car just got stolen couple of days back, on Sunday. He left his car at his friend's place in Puchong and car pooled to a photoshoot. Next thing he knew, the car was gone when he returned in the afternoon.

It's not a first case though, just a few weeks back his friend whose place he parked at also got his Myvi stolen. Plenty more were also stolen in between the time from that Myvi to my bro's turn. Seems like the police here can't do nuts. Security here has gone to hell.

But anyways, Toyota Corolla SEG only wei. Who would have thought that such an old car also they wanna steal. I dunno whether it is worth their time and effort butchering our car for spare parts to sell. Give problem to us only orz

Now he has to drive mine while i get chauffeured around by my parents to college. Very inconvenient but i will have to live with it for while grrrr. ~~Now they can keep tabs on me when i choose to skip class.~~

Mocking Bird

2010-07-01T19:28:00.002+08:00

Do not mock or condemn the person who make mistakes. Instead think about how you would feel if you were in that position. Learn from the mistakes instead and thank that person for the lesson.

Striving

2010-07-01T12:44:00.006+08:00

Striving to improve...that is what that has been going on with me since the beginning of this year. I understand not the urgency of it but something clicked within me and suddenly, time passes so fast and it's already July.

Time is something relative, and even in cultural studies we learnt that time can be elastic. It seems to pass by relatively faster when one immerses self in work. Once, i had the experience of having to suffer the loss of my computer for a few days, making it almost impossible for me to do any work. In that duration, time moved so slow that it felt totally awkward to someone like me whose days passes by in the blink of an eye. The day seemed to last longer and i was constantly checking the time at intervals to find that it ticks by so slowly.

Now i'm back into the hectic routine work i do for assignments...hell it feels as if someone is snatching away time from me. I have to sacrifice a lot of sleep to work on personal development and am constantly looking for ways to improve in both creativity and skill.

Why so serious?
Maybe because i feel inadequate to join the industry with my current level. I'm about to graduate in another half a year or so and i feel insecure. I suppose i'm not the first to be thinking in such a way but i can't help it. Just hope for the best i guess and try to lessen that insecurity with preparation, which i think i am trying to now.

It disheartens me a bit to know that before art school, my self study was much more efficient up to a certain level. Without guidance at that time, i had to rely alot of guess work and interpretation to get somewhere with my works. I have freedom of time to slowly analyze and learn from other artists.

Eventually though, i hit a wall and could not proceed further for i was without guidance on 'correct' art concepts. I virtually learnt nothing about art during my schooling days up to high school, simply because the schools i have been never truly emphasized art. So it was quite a handicap there.

"Take out your artblocks class, today we draw gotong-royong".

That was about it...no pointers on how to mix your colors, nothing about the color wheel, nothing about composition, nothing about proportional anatomical studies, nothing about the types of mediums and the techniques to use em. At the end of the day we usually end up doing abstract art pieces which even i wasn't very proud of.

And so, it was really a struggle for me in the first 2 years of being in art college. Everything was so new and raw to me. Especially working the traditional way of color pencils, gauche, acrylics and even using the most basic of tools, the pencil. It was fun but truly stressful moment for me with unfamiliarity of tools since i have been self learning only digitally.

Anyways, i thought that art school would start bringing me into new heights with the right guidance. But sadly, not so in some ways.

As i was saying earlier on, i had more time to do analyzing when i was learning myself. It seems that luxury is no longer possible in art school. Everything i ever get trained on is speed. Speed in meeting deadlines. That way most of the time i took shortcuts and was not truly able understand fully the work that i am assigned with sometimes. It is not wrong since commercial works have harsh demands on speed these days. But i felt that i am learning even less this way. I just wish that the college would lighten up a bit but then that would be another problem in itself again.

i do at times look back at my pre-college works with awe and wonder to myself how i managed to achieve something of that magnitude at that time. Truth be told i hold a higher value to my older stuff although it is lacking in skills and looks fugly. I still feel endeared to them and treasure them like my own children. Maybe because it was the amount of effort i put into them. Although the concepts were not strong and i was lacking in the correct art sense, the process of building it painstakingly might have been the key to its perceived added value. I can easily rebuild something of that same quality or better with 10 times the speed now, but sadly the feeling will be different.

So i ponder to myself sometimes. Was it a right move from my part to bring myself to come to art college? would it have been better to just do self learning, taking a longer time but gaining much more out of it? what would it have been like if i just treated this as a hobby? Questions that might never have answers to them but that is just how it is. Regrets only serve to pull oneself down so i would just have to console myself that this is for the best.

The Road Not Taken. ~Robert Frost

Colours of Dreams

2010-06-20T01:06:00.002+08:00

HELL YEA! The sample pictures of our book has arrived! X.X
I just can't wait to get hold of a copy for myself. In another 2 weeks or so the books will be ready to make its debut in Singapore Cosfest 2010! (if all goes well i hope) I will not be attending Cosfest though and would have to wait for the others to bring it back from Sg.

Enough prattling for now, have a look at the samples :D

I'm quite excited coz this is the first time having my stuff along with my gang's printed in a book! I guess this is the only thing i might be looking forward to in a while.....

Fantasy Earth Zero Contest

2010-06-15T23:47:00.005+08:00

Joined another contest on deviantart. Supposed to do a rendition of our own version of either warrior, mage or scout. I chose scout at 1st but gave up and went for warrior instead. So here's some progress of what i did to the final product.

Did some rough sketches and silhouette study to find a suitable one for me to work on. i wanted an interesting silhouette that will bring out a character more, so i chose the bottom right one. Eventually i combined other stuff together from all that mess to the base i chose. I can already hear ringing words from my lecturer that i need to do more but time is not on my side and i am loaded with college assignments as well. This is the best i could do for now.

Next comes the weapon. I researched a bit on the skill list tree of the warrior class for the game. Then i came up with a weapon that could use ALL skills. We have the single handed weapon and shield skills followed by smashing skills for double handed wielders. As usual my preference of weapons usually end up with hammers. So keeping the hammer in mind, i created a gauntlet/shield that acts as defence and offence at the same time should the warrior wanted to do hand to hand. Think God of War gauntlets of Zeus. Then a hammer would still need a long haft, so a spear it is. And one that could combine with the shield gauntlet thingy to make it a hammer. There you go, best of both worlds for the skill tree.

The initial rough stage...the theme for my armor is 'Hawk'. The hammer looked weird at this point but i couldn't be bothered to fix it at that time. Assignments first.

Later i whipped up a more solid looking hammer head and tested it on the arm that was to wear it as well.

Confirmed the outline at this point and worked on the basic color feel i would want for the overall.

The very initial color base without the shine works yet. The armor still needs some polishing for that extra glow.

The red skirt-cloak was feeling a bit too monotone and making it seem lacking in contrast and boring. So i tweaked a dark blue tone to it instead and found it more satisfactory. Polished the armor a bit to have that oooo-so-shiny effect.

Fun facts
- After completion, i notice that the colors are very Ragnarok Online-ish. I might have been subconsciously doing a color scheme close to theirs. Coz that was the very 1st mmorpg that i loved very much.

- As if the color scheme wasn't a blow enough, many pointed out that this looked something like the paladin class of Ragnarok Online. Ok...must be the blue i made myself change to. Wait does that mean it would be a Lord Knight class if i left it red instead? ARGGGH FAIL IS ME!

- So yea because i wanted to do hawkish stuff, i ended up with a chocobo head for the hammer head. I totally did not intend for it to be chocobo related and reffed off a real hawk's features. To tell the truth i kinda despise FF.

-The earlier hammer head ended up looking like it came out of Card Captor Sakura xD not intended as well. But rofl, really looks like that wand Sakura carries about capturing cards.

---

Fat chance of winning for this, but just gain more experience joining these competitions. ;_; i wished that i could draw more for the contest. But i'm so time tied this sem that i wanna go jump off some building.

Don't Say Lazy

2010-06-07T17:27:00.007+08:00

Sadly this is not an article about K-on! but only borrowing the title of the song for my entry title.

Another day, another week, another month, another sem. We as students never cease to piss our lecturers off, just to be fair about how they mess with our lives too. Today, like any other day of the week we get constant slapping to the face on how much we really suck.

Recap on some of the finer points we heard today from our lecturer.

"You guys are too lazy, never listen to what i say and love to do/repeat mistakes"
i would avoid it too if i had such strong art sense to know how to...

"90% of the pile of works here can be trashed into the bin"
at least my work can help fill up the bin for the trash lady to take out...

"The good ones must have gone to other majors like multimedia or others and left the remaining in Illustration"
...i...*speechless*

"Only once in 10 years we get a special case"
Looks like we can strike out our batch for this...

"Illustration major is a master in everything (drawing related)"
Come to think of it we must be architects when we need to, fashion designer when we need to, hairstylist when we need to, mecha artist when we need to....*list goes on*

"Illustration is hard to get jobs, because you are not what the industry wants. You graduate but your art sense is not there."
D: i think i'll go be a programmer...

I'm beginning to feel that it is true what my brother tells me sometimes. If you're not talented in some ways this whole art deal is a real torture to the common art-tart wannabes. Be it you have talent in execution, talent in hard work, talent in enduring verbal abuse, etc. We must at least possess one of those traits to survive in a more bearable state. Screw the "you can be like this level too without being talented but through working 10 times harder than the talented person next to you". So yea, you work 10 times harder just to be barely able to keep up, and let's just say that next talented dood just puts in a little effort, and VOILA! you go "wth have i been doing..."

You'll end up disillusioned at some point at why DA FARK you can't get to do anything right no matter how much more you put in than the regular Joe. Nevermind you think, just put in more effort. Devote your life, devote every waking second of your time and focus into it. And still the results are bare minimal. Something is really not right here...the word 'SUCK' must really be written somewhere on your body and sapping all your goodness away.

Let's just say you choose to continue in that pattern and push on despite not seeing any visible improvements yet. You ignore the fact that you have to sacrifice more to get by. Then comes along the weekly bombardment of nuclear bombs that goes off with radiation that contains the 'SUCK' ions. Shit hits the fan at this point...the feeling gets worst that all this while what you have been doing is for nothing.

That's where you are given one of the choices in life which will determine your outcome. Take the easy way, just forsake this hot pot for the frying pan and hope for the best in future.

OR

Do it the tough guy way as the saying goes "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going". I'm sure if you are familiar with Benjamin (China dood) you would know how he toughed it out and walked through all the shit and 'SUCK' radiation. He was told that he will never make it with his works and now? who's having the last laugh when he's making a name for himself?

So at the end of the day, morales might run low and you might be covered full with shit (from the spinning fan earlier). But don't give up yet coz everyone in the same room is covered in shit as you are. Go use that shit, fertilize some flowers, smell those flowers and get that ass working again.

I need this entry for my own sake more than anyone else...

They did it again...

2010-05-31T20:58:00.003+08:00

They did it again.

I'm suffering burnout at the early stages once more.

I just feel like spending a day, sitting at one spot stoning without a thought in my mind. Those days are almost impossible to come by anymore. Not a day goes by without something of a drawing medium in my hand. I don't despise it but my arms feel like falling off.

What have i to look forward to these days, i do not know myself.

Sorry for lack of updates, and when i do it's mostly negatives.

Adios.

Miku Append

2010-05-16T22:47:00.005+08:00

Has been some time since i last updated on Miku vids on this blog. For good reason of diversifying my interest elsewhere. Anyways, some genius chinese dood used the new Miku Append, which supposedly sounds more realistic than the older version of Miku to make the above song. Hear it and let me know what you think lol. I just think my wife got a superb upgrade.

more details at the official Crypton site if you interested. Not only her voice got an upgrade now she looks more mature. This version has it's own appeal compared with the old one. I like them both actually.

Unrelated, here's a little something fun to read.

I was stuck in a traffic jam recently. Nothing moved for ages when a man rapped on my window. "What's going on?," I asked.

''Terrorists down the road have kidnapped a few BN politicians. They're asking for a ransom or they're going to set them alight with petrol. We're going from car to car, taking up a collection."
I then asked, "How much is everyone giving on average?"

"Most people are giving a gallon."

All Good Things Must End

2010-05-09T23:50:00.008+08:00

...and that is my sem break. Time to face sleepless nights again starting tomorrow.

My whole holiday has been a fruitful time for me to recuperate and work on personal projects plus commissions to fuel my expensive hobby of figurines. So i totally screwed doing any of the assigned holiday works ahahaha. I'm so gonna get it but i think i'm not alone in this so yea :/

I was working on some pieces of stuff for a Touhou artbook together with my doujin group, due for printing around June. Deadline was pretty long, since the beginning of this year actually but due to my own tight college schedule i only managed to get some of it done during the 7-week-break.

Needless to say when i eat, sleep, play or what not i was always thinking about Touhou stuff. Thanx also to the constant pushing from the other members to keep me motivated throughout the entire break.

Here are some super small thumbs of what i was up to during my whole break, in the order of how i posted it. No high res will be up for now until the book is officially printed and sold ^^;;

I'm gonna have to go back and retouch-up the older ones orzll...
With each new piece i produce i feel that my previous pieces lack completeness. But not now since quantity is an issue. I promised 6 pieces but ended up assigned 10 now because of some others who promised to produce more...

Since sem has started...i can't promise anything but try to work towards that 10. Hope i won't burn myself out D:

Introverts Vs Extroverts

2010-04-13T13:03:00.005+08:00

Introverts usually get a bad rap from extroverts. They are often defined in a negative way: shy, lacking in confidence and social skills, withdrawn, etc. Extroverts often can't understand why someone would happily decline an invitation to a party so they can stay at home on their own.

Never has there been an article i read which comes across explaining what i've always wanted to express but couldn't word it down properly. Upon completion of reading this post , i hope you will understand my kind much better.

Extroverts gains energy from interacting with others, which is why they love going to parties. Put an extrovert in an empty house, and chances are that he will be itching to get out and make contact with others fairly quickly.

Introverts, on the other hand, would feel extremely comfortable spending time on their own, because they gain energy from being alone and reflecting, and expend energy when interacting.

Suffice to say that we are the exact polar opposites of each other. I respect the choices of extroverts (ETs) wanting to hang out more often, so i hope the same respect can be shown to introverts(ITs). Exerting yourselves to get an IT to participate is just being mean to the other party if he chooses not to be participative.

One activity that's designed to torture introverts, while providing a spotlight for the extroverts, is karaoke. ... I sat with my fellow introverts and hoped that I could get through the session simply by singing through along during some of the choruses.

Hell yea, what the heack is with Karaoke. Beg as you must for me to participate in one, i will never compromise to put myself in a situation which is awkward to both me and the ETs. I was once cheated to enter with a group of friends before. It was pure torture from the 18th level of hell. I never kept in contact those friends anymore.

Things were going well until one of the ETs felt that they needed to hear an IT solo.

Obviously, some ITs would reject the offer if they aren't feeling up to it, to which ETs will with sadistic glee use quotes like

"Don't be such spoil sports!"
"Come on! Just this once we'll like to hear you do it!"

i say to you, F*CK YOU! i don't usually endorse using foul language in my entries, but that is how pissed i am with incessant annoyances coming from ETs. LEAVE US BE WHEN WE FEEL LIKE WE WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE.

After a suitable period of time, I excused myself and made to take my leave. Almost immediately, one of the other ITs stood up and announced that she had to go too.

We both exhaled loudly as soon as we were out of earshot.

I salute the author for even forebearing with the whole karaoke shit. I would just walk out despite losing friends in the process. Who needs them anyway. Coming out of the karaoke is just like being released from a torture prison except that it's not much a prison to me because i am not bounded by the shackles called friendship. Sure i do give face sometimes and if it goes beyond my annoyance threshold i'm off.

I wouldn't describe myself as being shy or socially inept; far from it. Still, i do feel decidedly uncomfortable in certain social settings. I don't do large parties very well. Over the years, i have become quite adept at faking small talk with strangers, but it's about as pleasurable as a root canal without anesthetics.

*nods head in agreement*
i wholeheartedly support what is said here. And yes, most often than not i am faking a face when mingling with strangers.

I once went to a party with an ET friend. As soon as we were through the host's front door, he was off. He spent the entire evening working the room, talking to different people and having a ball. I, on the other hand, found a free chair around a table and sat there for the entire evening, listening to the extroverts who came and went.

i wouldn't consider myself that much of an IT in this case, because i do mingle around a bit. To which after that i would love to adjourn somewhere to spend some time just sitting around and chilling.

I would rather stay at home with a good book.

Exactly. What's better than having to read a book peacefully or for my case just work on my drawings.

I respect who or what you are. So would you do the same for me?

All citations taken from Monday 12 April 2010 Star paper, "Party poopers" by Mary Schneider. Credit goes to her marvelous article.

Graduation from Bachelorhood

2010-04-08T15:06:00.005+08:00

Graduation from bachelorhood, outcast to the brotherhood...

Congratulations,
i'm happy for you but at the same time i feel something within me has passed on.

Congratulations,
i celebrate for you but what is this knife i'm holding in my hands now?

Congratulations,
i share the joy of seeing the pair of you together but what is this red substance flowing down my cheeks?

Congratulations,
summer has come for you but winter drapes the remaining few of us seeking warmth from one another.

Congratulations,
you managed to break the curse of this sad and ronery brotherhood before any of us.

Congratulations biatch D:

i dedicate this video to you.

Hiatus

2010-04-05T14:03:00.008+08:00

Sem breaks are usually when the blog gets neglected. Coz there's pretty much nothing interesting happening for me to rant about. Cept maybe boiling into a hard-boiled egg in this crazily hot weather.

That aside, i'm trying to maximize my personal time during this hols. Live my life to the fullest. Game like no tomorrow. Watch anime like no tomorrow. Draw like no tomorrow. And, last but not least, sleep like no tomorrow. It's the last long one i'll ever get before i get booted down the hole in Sparta. Might as well live like i won't get another chance.

Another year to go, and i'm still undecided of what to do once i grad. When i graduated from my comp science at least my goal then was to pursue art. Now that i'm here i'm lost as to what to do when i'm done with the course. Work as a programmer? then for what purpose did i enroll for the 3 years of torture? I might be a M but not to this extent.

So this leaves me with the next obvious option. Work along the lines of what i'm taking up now. So what will i be when i'm out? Character designer for game companies? Sure i'll love to and is probably what i really wanted but i see it as an impossibly far-off goal as of now. Maybe with opportunities to learn and grow in future then i'll come back to it.

Ah if not that then? Freelancing for advertising visuals and such while i look for another job? Ugh i won't be enjoying this one but i need moolahs to make a living right? If it comes down to this why not. Then the other job might be tutoring or lecturing while i get the ins and outs of the art industry. Coz where i am right now? i don't even know what jobs are there available for me when i'm out.

Moving on, how bout working for animation firms? i can handle 2d animations but if its 3d then goodbye-sayonara-see-you-in-hell. I haven't gone through matte painting yet so i'm not sure how i can be useful in that aspect as of now. I personally wont mind getting a 2d animation job, sure it's thankless, stagnant, and takes long hours to accomplish but i can tolerate that with some prior insight into this field before.

Now the least expected place i'll ever end up in...Design firms. Hell no i'm not cut for design and i know it. Sure it's nice to see well made designs and all but i'm not prime cut for CREATING them. I might be able to produce kindergarten-standard of designs and that's about it. And that's already pushing myself to the limits

How about manga artist? Sure if you can forebear with cheezy titles i might come up with. You might think, nah how cheezy can it get? Seen it all. Nothing will ever prepare you for the furies i will unleash if i ever venture into doing this for a living. Oh but don't worry, it'll be a short-lived one coz i might have died from starvation halfway between and the world will be rid of a pestilence like me. Humans will regain their sight again after this blinding ordeal.

As of 4th of May 2010, Kai has yet to make any decisions for his own future orz
2 years 8 months left to the end of the world.

March Comes Marching Down

2010-03-08T22:43:00.005+08:00

If ever any cute girl comes along to me dressed like this with the same pose, i can die a cutesy death on the spot without a care...

When the blog gets neglected, save it with step-by-steps or tutorials. Yeaaaaaa.
Not very different from the usual step-by-steps i post here, except this one contains some of the quick and dirty techniques i put to use all the time 8D

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I'm already feeling the holiday mood and starting to neglect TOA work....I'm so sick of the simplified figures assignment these days that i barely want to do them at all. So i just aim for some C to C+ gradings with my lousiest effort ever. Sorry SS i don't feel motivated to do them anymore.

I don't feel productive lately too. I'm trying to take a short break from drawing and spend some leisure time gaming and watching anime, which i haven't done in ages. This be doing me some good as it boosts my moods recently. I'm no longer so time-tied and workaholic for the meantime. Good or bad thing i won't know, but i live life for the moment and worry later.

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i noticed that after entering art school, the effects of the fundamentals that i were taught during my foundation year is seriously starting to show up now. The way i was taught to perceive everything as lines, simple forms and shapes has granted me now the power of sharinga- *ahem*, the power to perceive almost all objects around me into it's most basic form and structure with my eyes. I coin the term "Artnigan" for the ability my eyes possess now, aside from my inherent ability to see everything else in the most perverted way possible (eroningan).

Putting aside all the eroningan-shenanigan-vegan stuff, this new found ability that is triggered subconsciously when i plan to draw or visualize an object, is seriously a big help. There were complex things i never managed to put on paper before but has now become more manageable thanx to 'Artnigan'.

Since it has only just activated in its preliminary stage, i'm still not utilizing it to its full potential yet. I'll make sure to master this skill to level up and have my irises turned into atom-shaped patterns. Maybe as i go further along down this ninj-... art path of no return, i'll start picking up more useful abilities such as being able to plagiarize techniques by observation, heack maybe i'll even learn to see through clothing.

signing off now,
adios

Dishonesty is the best policy?

2010-02-23T22:27:00.003+08:00

My bro lost his wallet today. More like it got nicked 3 minutes after he was conscious he dropped it. He knew he dropped it when he got out of the car and when he checked his pockets, realised it was missing, went back for it in like the time span of a few minutes only to find that it had gone with the wind.

Take not what is not yours. Don't parents teach that to their kids anymore? Greed is seeping into the hearts and souls of the people around us now. Gone were the days of kindness and good Samaritans. Finders keepers is more the norm now, or each for their own.

I heard that in Japan you'll still find your belongings where it was even after hours of losing it. This shows how society has really deteriorated in this country. Ok la to be fair not only here but its the scenario common in many countries. Moral values are regarded as belongings of fools, and without it is the way to go in order to survive and 'climb the ladder of success'.

I would rather stay the fool and live with a clean conscious than know that my actions are harming others. Let us not be like them hmm Kay?

Gender Bender

2010-02-19T00:51:00.013+08:00

Ahhhh the CNY holidays. How i wish you would last another week. I feel well rested although i have to finish up my acrylics. Gotta make the most of my remaining 3 days.

Anyways, lately i'm getting alot of the "you look like a girl" thingy again. Hair length aside, are my features really lady-like? i mean i purposely left my moustache and for-what-passes-off-as-goatee to show that i'm a GUY. Even my broader shoulders should scream guyliness. But i guess that can be easily overlooked since i'm quite thin and possess slender fingers of an artist. Come on i even dress like a slop with t-shirts and short pants/jeans all the time.

It wasn't so bad about a year or so before, when i was still working out at the gym. At least at that time i had some mass to gloat about. I'm currently leeching off my bro's gym pass during the weekends but it won't be enough to rebuild what i lost. So i'll just have to live with it lol. I don't mind getting mixed up as a girl actually but i bet the other party would dearly want to decimate me from the face of earth for parading myself as such (unintentionally).

So just for amusement of you dear readers, i'll recap some of the highlights of those moments.

I was manning a doujin booth at a comic convention, wearing a cap and all when a potential customer stopped by to take a look at the wares present. I looked up from my sketching and prepared to serve. When i spoke the girl suddenly was taken aback, and started giggling to herself while mumbling "I thought you were a girl". I gave my usual smile and laughed along. This one i understand the mix up because 1) the booth i was manning would look like what a girl group would be setting up, with pinks and flowery art and all thanx to my doujin mates. 2) i was wearing a cap so it's understandable to get confused.

I was at Sunway Pyramid looking for a prank gift of a spoon for a friend's birthday, when the shopkeeper of a stall near Ace Hardware approached me and said "Miss can i help you" only to realise mere seconds later that i am a guy. Ended up shopkeeper apologized profusely which i merely just laughed and brushed the comment aside.

I was getting a slurpee at one of the 7-eleven's near TOA, and when i was paying for the drink and chatting with my friend, the lady attending to me suddenly laughed and said "I thought you were a girl until you spoke" to which i gave my usual response. It's always about the voice that lets them know eh? does that make me eligible for a Thai entertainer now? without the works and all.

There were several times when i joint my bro for gatherings with his friends, when i am mistaken for his girlfriend to which they will start off with: 1) "Chun! from the car window just now i thought who was that hawt chic together with your bro!" 2)" Chun! you cheat my feelings. From the back you look like a chic. I thought your bro finally got himself a girlfriend".

Years back when i was in Ipoh visiting a friend, we went dining at one of the famous ngar-choi-kai restaurants. The drink lady comes over takes order, and when it was my turn asks "Leng lui oi yam meh ar?" (what do you want to drink lenglui) To which i turn my head and she corrects herself immediately and changes the term to "lengchai" while laughing.

A very recent case was yesterday when i went visiting to some of my friend's place. My friend's grandpa mistook me for somebody's wife...To which the mother of my friend came telling me later and joked about it. lolwut? wife material i am now?

Best is when i walk into a guy's toilet in shopping complexes sometimes and receive funny reactions from the people walking out of it, taking second glances before they exit, or look taken aback. Even those within gave me double looks as if i'm at the wrong place. xD

I have plenty more stories back during my Monash days, about how invigilators got cheated, friends even. But i think that's enough for now. Things like these certainly makes my life more interesting hahaha. Still it's a bit depressing to know that i lack guyliness on the outside orzlll

To conclude, i'm a guy that is lesbian 8D
Tres bien.

Double combo

2010-02-14T09:57:00.005+08:00

"Be my valentine kai-sama"

Happy Chinese New Year and Happy S.A.D/Valentine!
._. so boring....

it's nice to eat chocolates already in the fridge today...
*silent cry within the soul*

The Simplest

2010-02-05T01:46:00.003+08:00

Designed a simple mascot for a simple site called the simplest which i did a quick favor to a simple friend who e-mailed a simple message to me requesting for my simple skills. That's a lot of simples in one sentence phew. Anyways check out the site for simple stuff related to your computer needs, from handy software tools to tips and tricks to get stuff done easily with your computer.

Lame Sauce acrylic finals

2010-02-02T22:59:00.003+08:00

Some lamesauce rough thumbs i did for what i'm about to paint for my acrylic finals.

I could do this one if i wanted to, but wasn't the prime choice of lect.

Both tutor and lect preferred me to do this one...i have no qualms coz i did want to do this.

this is lamesauce pic i did to reach the 3 thumb quota.

Hafta show a colour thumb next week. I have to repaint the 2nd piece above to reflect what i want on the board or else i'm gonna suffer later. Oh god there goes my CNY break...3 weeks of total time to paint an A2 size illustration board. I am so gonna die.

The 2010 Tigress

2010-01-26T20:48:00.005+08:00

Haven't been showing step-by-steps lately. So yea...

I started off with wanting some anatomy practice, so i looked through my sketch book and hey, let's use this. Not much of an angle or dynamic-ism, but heack i thought if i were to study anatomy i can screw all that.

lalala did this rough when i was artjaming with some nutty friends beginning of this year. Initially i was lazy and thought of just going with this and touching up the features a bit. Then i thought "Hey why not try doing semi-realistic for once. It might be interesting". Turned out to be quite fruitful and fulfilling since i haven't really done this before. Besides i could hand this in for simplified figures...I WISH! i will get killed by SS if i do orzlll

Continuing where i left off, i used the above rough as a base, sketched the supposedly more realistic curves, and changed the pose a bit to make her more menacing than pouty. Did some initial shades for the body. I tried working differently this time by going from dark tone to light, just like acrylics. Turns out i'm pretty bad working this way so i need more practice.

Added in stuff i forgot like the tail and some of the waist length hair. Rendered some more to bring out the basic 3d form of the clothes, hair, etc.

It was pretty done when i reached this stage, all was left was to clean up the rough outline and touch up more places. IMHO i could have stopped here but i felt that the outline was giving the pic less than semi-realistic result. Still very manga-ish which defeats my purpose. So i pushed on.

Somehow when the outlines weren't so obvious it made her look a bit broad. As in really plump and well-covered. Realistically it would be the body most women would have in real life. But i wasn't satisfied at stopping here and soon realized after a while that she did seem plump to me.

So time to put in my own touches and made her slimmer and gave her more ideal, sexy proportions which our lects can't seem to stop emphasizing. I suppose it did add a bit of aesthetics to it after i did so. I decided to stop now cause my main focus was not to spend too much time on this piece. I wanted it as learning material so i considered it done. Took roughly 4-5 hours, done between short breaks of work i have piled up.

What i have gained (slightly):
- how to draw a less manga-ish pretty face.
- a more realistic sexy body.
- insight of the beauty of real tigers (i was fascinated by the stock photo references i have)

What i could have done better:
- spend more time polishing the body and working on the arms. Still not too familiar with doing nicely shaped semi-realistic arms.
- worked on a better background to really bring out the character.

I Dream a Dream

2010-01-20T20:35:00.004+08:00

my dream is to make a name for myself in art.
my dream is to be a gentleman to a princess i can pamper.
my dream is to invent a time machine which can make 48 hours a day possible.

-----------------------------------

ok ok those are not the actual point of this post.
Though the word dream can be used to mean wishes/goal for oneself, what i meant was the literal dream. The one we all have sometimes when we sleep at night.

i've been having very awkward dreams lately. 3 within a time span of 2 weeks to be exact. This is an anomaly to me since i do not dream a lot. Sometimes as long as between months.

1. I dreamt the world's population declined drastically, with me living alone in my own house which is the only safe sanctuary. Everything else is hostile, since well, think along the lines of "I am Legend". The people have somehow turned to zombie/vampires roaming around trying to kill me when they can. The mood isn't dark though, so i did'nt deem it a nightmare and wake up to cold sweat. It's more like how i lived my life alone, which was actually quite enjoyable even with no one around. Woke up unharmed and feeling a bit weird.

2. I dreamt i had only a week to live. I was hit with some incurable disease and i knew my time was running out. So i spent that one week telling families about my impending doom, passed on my belongings to people who would need them. And finally, my most inner wish, to create a final masterpiece of art before i die. I made in time and i woke up when i died. Again i felt out of place finding myself still alive when i woke up.

3. Just today i dreamt that i found the girl of my dreams (lol?), went out with her and had plenty of happy times together with her. Not much detail here cause it was just courtship and hanging out together. The most perfect dream girl i could pamper. I woke up halfway feeling...disoriented...and sad. It was so real i was like really living in it. Actually, i had such a dream in the past before very long ago. I felt depressed the rest of the day then knowing that it wasn't real. Different girls for this time and then, but personality wise? i think i can confirm to myself that my specifications did not change. I am still looking for that dream girl.

-----------------------------------

So are these dreams some sort of sign to me? people have been said to find dreams as an omen for something that has happened, yet to happen or really just passed off as another wild imagination. For myself, i think it might have been things i've kept in myself subconsciously taking form in my fantasies. How i interpret it myself is

1. i am always, and still is a home boy. Meaning there is no place like home. I can't leave home for more than a couple of hours without thinking of heading back there again. It was always in me also to love being alone. My favorite way of passing my holidays is to spend them alone. Not with anybody. Just alone. Perfect get away from everything. I'm pretty antisocial which i am constantly forcing myself to change because this world is too complex to live a life of a hermit now. But i sure don't enjoy mingling with zombies/vampires.

2. i dunno about this one. I don't think i can interpret it accurately but i think what my own dream is telling me is to do the things i need to do NOW. Before everything just passes by in a blink of an eye. Maybe in future when i'm near death this is what would actually happen.

3. this is...leaving me quite speechless. Has the 24 years of solitude gotten subconsciously to me that my inner desires are to have a companion? i sort of enjoy the freedom and solitude i have now (read number 1). But without me knowing i might have been longing for my other half. With my current tight schedule truth be told i can't afford to. I might just neglect her, which is not what i want. So i guess i just have to tell my inner self to hang in there.

The funny things about these dreams are, it never felt so real before to me. All three of them. So real i felt i was still connected to it when i woke up. It took a while for me to get my bearings back on track. It was just like the story of Lao Zhi dreaming he was a butterfly, or was he a butterfly dreaming he was a human?

i scream...

2010-01-16T18:33:00.004+08:00

wat the...

If you're wondering what this is all about...i bit my lip a few days back while eating a popsicle, hence illustrated above for a pictorial view of what happened. (illustrated in bakemonogatari ending theme style)

Feels kinda surreal sucking/licking on my own blood which kept flowing non stop while i was having my popsicle. The process kept repeating until i completely finished it. The bleeding stopped eventually which by that time i had a wonderful aftertaste of copper instead of the red bean flavor it was supposed to have.

i love blood hmm yess....

One Year Anniversary!

2010-01-07T20:36:00.003+08:00

Pfft...can't imagine i have been able to keep this blog alive for a exactly a year on today. Never thought that it would last more than a month when i first started. Let's hope it stays alive for another year eh?

New year, new stuff, new semester, new sinking feeling, same old me.
Been spending my new year paint chatting with my crazy art friends and wasting away precious time which could have been spent doing productive work. My engine has not warmed up yet.

Here's some of the doodles and stuff we did.

theme: Warrior girl, guess which is mine?

theme: Stationery girl. Meet erasers, staples, paper clips, sharpeners, 2b pencil and so forth. i want to be stapled (*´Д`) =3 -3 =3

theme: Vampire girl, Y SO SRS?

theme: Guns & girls. What is batman doing here...

Met some of the Degree course peeps and they totally give a different breathe of air. Refreshing.
That's it for now coz i don't wanna go into another rant post involving the hell i live in now.

Doodle oodles

2010-01-01T16:51:00.002+08:00

Just some doodling on paint chat that me and my ex-student been doing on Pixiv to test the beta out. Totally whole new paint chat experience.

welcome the year of the tiger! 2010!

Friendship

2009-12-21T19:55:00.003+08:00

Heh as expected of myself. I barely visit my own blog during the breaks when i have almost nothing to rant about. So i'll just write down what pops into my mind right now.

The Kai-ism definition of Friendship.

Friendship is only a thing of circumstances. Because i need to meet you often, i have to get along with you only for my own benefits, and vice versa. Out of sight, out of mind.

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Best friends exists only because there is something you want off each other. For example similar interests bonds a pair of best friends together. What both of them are looking for is close companionship whereby anything can be discussed openly, again for one's own benefit of killing boredom or just having an outlet for rants.

So what happens when both of them ceases to meet up that often because of the paths they chose?

The gap widens and they get drifted apart further and further away. Things of the past will just be for memory's sake and life goes on. Meeting again in the future will somehow be different. The bond shared will not be as close as it used to be, but using the lame excuse of "for old times sake" it will try to be revived.

Personally, friendship is a temporary thing to me. I used to treasure it so much that i never thought of losing the best friends i used to have. But as i grew up the harsh realities of life made me realize that 'friendship' is over-rated. I keep seeing stuff like 'Friends Forever' and the likes, which are all very fake and superficial to me. I won't disagree with you if you believe in it but to me it just rubs me the wrong way. The camaraderie-hood only lasts as long as the time we spend together.

I'll never do anything so pointless as to sacrifice myself for a best friend's sake. Everything i do, i have a reason to think about how it would be beneficial to me in the long run. If you speak about brotherhood and stuff like that i don't even believe in it. Your not even blood-related to me. I might only do it for an actual person related to me. You can tell me about how close we used to be, but that is that. Now is now. If there is any reason to help you it is in my own interests. Arms length.

How about old acquaintances i meet accidentally on the streets? Well, i still need to don on the cloak of "friendship" to keep things rolling. So i'll just wave and maybe do some small talk. Who knows i might need to deal with them again later in life, be it at a new workplace or environment.

So, that is the general idea of how i perceive friendship. Sad you might think, about this poor fool named kai which has such a bleak outlook of life as to condemn the notion friendship. No fool i am, just a realistic person very down to earth and tries not to be governed by emotions. Strong emotions do nothing for you but tie you down to attachments of worldly affairs.

Of course, things of theories are always idealistic. That is what i believe in, yet there are always exceptions to it because i am still a human and not a mechanical device. I am happy living as a one man island. But the world now is such that i would need to forge temporary friendships in order to survive. At some point i would still need your help, and you, mine.

More bluntly, i need to use you and you need to use me too.

Capturing Valueless Moments

2009-12-05T17:54:00.006+08:00

warning: image heavy post

These are the assignments i had to do for photography, according to theme.

TEXTURE

LIGHT & SHADOW

LINES

REFLECTION

COLORS

MALACCA

Jonker Street

red buildings

free piece

temple

FINAL

frosted glass: back

frosted glass: front

self composition

Any AD students ending up in this blog might laugh his/her ass off over the lowly nature of skillz IL students have for photography. Not that i really care since i'm not specializing in it.

Now begone this subject! and hopefully i wont have to see you again so often in the near future.

It's early Christmas!

2009-12-02T00:57:00.009+08:00

T.T my old 7-8 years CRT monitor recently gave me trouble till i could no longer work my cgs on it. So my ever resourceful bro ordered an awesome LCD monitor, the 22'' Dell 2209WA which was low in cost and quite accurate in color reproduction. Thanx mucho libre bro!

Value for money i would say. Only qualms now is that LCD monitors are quite bright compared to my CRT last time. On '0' brightness the LCD monitor is brighter than when my CRT was at 100. ~~Gonna burn my eyes faster now when i use it for health studies~~ . My eyes gonna take some time getting used to it and hopefully i won't have to wear specs because of it in the near future. And also things look so much sharper now that i have some getting used to.

me and my wive's workspace now with the new LCD monitor.

It's time to let you have a peek at the shrine i built for my wife. It's not really up to date yet since i'm still waiting for the other stuff to arrive. Been collecting since the first figurine of my wife was made available.

something doesn't belong here...

Lately again, tutor SS told me my stuff still very manga-ish xD

well...i wanted to try out on more detailed clothes shading.

"why is it i see same characters from you" ~SS
o shi...i shall stop...

o shi...another failed attempt to realisticize my simplified figures orzlll

i think i took to heart what Kin Sun mentioned about us focusing on drawing asian features more than westerners. Why so? because we were born asian. To westerners they draw their own features like breathing the air. But for us we need to dig up research and waste time mastering and getting used to something we don't see everyday. So he advised us to concentrate on refining the asian looks instead. (since it's like breathing to us)

But then again, asians have pretty flat and smooth features except for those that are extremely bony, ~~those on drugs~~ or the occasional cheekbones, etc. And that is where the problem starts...drawing asian features tend to skew the drawing towards manga style, well, since manga style IS actually asian style. And here we have the westerners trying to go for manga style now...

So, bottom line is i suck at trying to draw western features. It's not that i really can't but i don't feel motivated to do it. It's funny that when i draw scene drawings instead, i would automatically switch to western features without a problem. But when it comes to imagination simplified figures, i would rather almost all the time go for the asian look. Partly because i'm doing it on the night before submission tomorrow. So i gotta really push and motivate myself to work last minute, hence the results.

"i really want to see you try a non-manga style for imagination. It's not that it is'nt nice, but..." ~SS

i'm sorry SS ;_;
i will try harder next sem if i get you as tutor again.

The World Through Lenses

2009-11-27T22:23:00.008+08:00

"hey there babe, care to join me?"
RM12.80 worth of skittles....handpicked into different jars.

now i know that the orange ones have the most and purple the least D:

i'm so gonna get cavities after this assignment...

i've never been truly proud about my photography skills before and think that i never would. Truth be told i rarely held a camera to snap pics until i came to TOA. Still, for the 1st time ever i kinda like the pic above. Although it was rejected for the self-composed final piece, nevertheless it's my personal fav of the lot. Uncle D said that it is cute but not too suitable lol. (fortunately he chose another piece composed with skittles too, that leaves me with one more piece to show him)

Just to let you in on a bit of info, i was never a strong believer of taking, or for that matter composing something for photography. i have this conception in me that finds framing things into a photograph 'fake' and 'lifeless'.

Still, i did enjoy my time with Uncle D and i feel like i'm gonna miss him very much when this sem ends. (hopefully i won't fail his class *whimpers*) He made me much more interested in photography and sort of change my perspective of it. Thanks to him i managed to pick up some photography jargons which i never thought possible for myself to know. His lectures might seem draggy to some but i find that i cannot not pay attention to him. He's like a grandpa teaching his grandson about the lessons of life.

i still have my reservations about photography but at least i can accept it better now. Time and knowledge changes a person eh? a good mentor might just do the trick too...

i wonder if...

2009-11-24T23:32:00.003+08:00

...i am asking too much from myself.
i seek perfection in skills.
i seek to polish it to the highest degree.
i seek to accomplish it at the shortest time possible. [insert heuristic/greedy algorithm]

Why am i always racing against myself. Rationally i know that improvement comes with practice and time. Yet why am i so eager to prove to myself that i could, would and should reach perfection asap. Learning is life-long so perfection is close to impossible i suppose. There's this chinese saying along the lines of

"there is always a mountain higher than you, but do not forget that there is also a trail of mountains behind you"

i'm always willing to go that extra mile which stretches me thin sometimes, but still improvement comes too slowly or not at all. Is it because of the standards which i set too highly for myself? i'm not too sure, it just feels like i've reached a stagnant stage.

i know i was not born talented and i blame no one, but still it fills me with envy at times when i do meet such talents that require less effort than neccessary. Well, maybe i'm just disillusioning myself by only seeing the end result but not the things happening behind the scenes.

Oh well, i shouldn't be looking at it this way. Instead i might have other areas of specialties. ~~(like my inherent skill to annoy those around me without effort)~~

Nothing much i can do about it i guess, except to continue to work hard and prosper. (hopefully)

Workaholic Sinkhole

2009-11-13T00:02:00.006+08:00

i never used to value having to just sit down and listen to lectures, nod off, go home, rinse and repeat until the exams are suddenly here. Not until i stepped into the current hectic world i am in now.

True, time passes relatively slow when you are trying to pay attention to your lecturer droning away on the stage of his life. But realization dawns upon me now that i really missed that feeling. As the saying goes you never treasure something until it is gone.

Well, not exactly gone, since photography classes are basically lectures on cameras and i still have South East Asian culture studies. Still, i find the lack of such subjects now draws me to pay 120% attention in class. It's like an insatiable thirst which i didn't know i could possess.

The remaining subjects?

while ( kai_enrolled_in_TOA == true)
{
- Wake up early before 9;
- Go for a 3 hour class with almost non stop action at times;
- Pack home mountain-full of assignments;
- Moar work at night after a couple of hours of evening nap;
- Wrap up at 3 am;
}

it will be an infinite loop until i grad. (i think)

On the first day of orientation, our great principle T said that we were treated like we are already working for the next 3 years. i believe him then and still do now. i barely find time to rest these days. Rest feels more like a luxury now which is slowly turning into a rare delicacy.

And then when sem break arrives, it feels like a sort of emptiness whereby there is a sudden feeling that i have too much time on my hands (provided free-lancing jobs are not sought). It's like waking up feeling that i have to do some work or my day is unfulfilled. Some graduated seniors know this feeling very well whilst looking for jobs or even when the demands of their jobs are much easier than their study life.

Oh the sadness. On one hand we complain about how busy we are but when there is actually time to take a breather we feel out of place. My sensei told me once that most of the japs feel these way and have no clue on how to spend their hols. They have to hire assistants just to plan on how to spend their breaks. Habitual workaholics. Sadness.

Not sure what is in store for me in the future. Truth be told i have no idea what i'm gonna come out to be. i aim to be a tutor and maybe proceed to be a lecturer. But it might seem a little far fetched for me with my skill level. i'm working hard towards it and lets hope that by the time i graduate in about 1 year+ time i'm up for it. Hopefully, tutorship gives me more freedom and confidence to hone my knives.

Back to some happy time with the workload i have. And my parents and acquaintances wonder why i'm still single...

Learn Respect

2009-11-07T19:07:00.005+08:00

Saturday classes.

i wake up each Saturday morning loathing to take a 30 min drive to college for a less than 2 hour class, and then take another 30 min drive home. i find it extremely difficult to make myself get up from bed each time, and with intentions to skip class entirely to catch a few more hours of sleep.

Sadly, i got to play the good student role for a while more since i'm heading down to Singapore in another 2 weeks time during the weekends. Just for those who didn't know, TOA is a damn strict biatch with no exceptions when it comes to attendance. Skip more than 2 times and see you again next sem.

-------------------------------------

Ok enough of long-winded unrelated rants. Let's get to the point. As much as i hate having Saturday classes of South-East Asia studies, i learn to tolerate it. i keep telling myself it isn't the lecturer's fault to choose having classes on Saturdays. (Thanx to TOA for over-committing to the enrolment of new students)

Today, half-way through lecture, SB suddenly yelled in mandarin to the back of the class,

"WHO SAID SAU HAI"

and stared with popping angry eyes. (note: lecturer's name is close sounding to that and leave it to students to come up with creative vulgar names for lecturers)

I got a shock and wondered what happened. It was only after class i got to know that some punks at the back of the class had the guts to say out loudly "Sau Hai" (which means skinny cunt in canto) while he was lecturing.

Come on people. Learn respect.

Bad enough today most of the students dozed off, occassionally having SB still humor them with turning off the lights for them to rest. There's only so much a person can take. How much further must they push the boundaries of tolerance before its limit is reached.

You might hate a lecturer for whatever reason, but there is a reason why he/she is the lecturer and not you. Take your dislike elsewhere outside of the class out of the lecturer's scope of sight and sound. You can do your bitching during lunch hours, on the phone, on msn, or even on blogs but please, not within range of the lecturer.

They are human too. You stab they bleed. You think they are happy teaching a bunch of uninterested students like us? They have families to feed too mind you.

Learn your place in the world. Learn respect.

My Girlfriend is the President

2009-11-05T22:27:00.003+08:00

My my, interesting what ero games come up with these days.

Moe school girls for president?
Another moe school girl as the Tsar of Russia?
Pope as the Sith?

Yes we can....YES WE CAN!!!!

i'll try not to laugh myself to death xD

This is another reason why the japs are so f**ked up.

-------------------------------

On an unrelated note, i passed up the halloween pic i did in the previous post for one of the imagination pieces of simplified figures. Comments i got from my tutor SS?

"try not to make it so manga style...." ~SS

i don't blame him as my other piece was a futuristic catgirl leaping from buildings...xD

Still, i tried to make it realistic-ish but as another lecturer/tutor LW once said,

"style is hard to change overnight, instead why not improve it further using simplified figure techniques" ~LW

i wish i could but the industry is especially cruel to visuals done using manga style orzlll

The general public has been brainwashed by westerners all these years that they feel much more comfy with the western style. Manga style is seen as low culture instead. How can i blame them? Tom, Dick and Harry these days can churn out [manga/NarutardxSasugay/SnapexHarryxDumbledore] art with little effort. i dare say it is over-saturated.

The irony is i'm beginning to see western cartoons moving towards this style. (e.g Ben 10, PPG, Avatar)

so i'm liek wtf?
screw you biatches ima doing what i like and you're not gonna stop me. i can foresee a bleak future for myself tho....

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-31T10:58:00.003+08:00

Happy Halloween doods! Busy as usual but i can't miss this chance up.
Have a treat on my waifu.

trick or treat?

Although i don't celebrate Halloween but i always look forward to it. Much more than my own birthday or anything. Weird you say and i think so myself too.

Thank you my homies!

2009-10-18T22:51:00.003+08:00

Thanx for the wishes peeps!

But it was just like any other Sunday, so it didn't feel like it hahaha.

Back to work.

Beginning of the End

2009-10-04T07:31:00.005+08:00

The ice has thawed a bit and am less demotivated.
I think working a bit on my personal works helped. (and no not because it is pervy stuff)

is this where i'm supposed to wear it?
inspired by Aya Hirano's closet malfunction

Still, i can't recall when was the last time i had the most restful sleep eversince the start of sem.

Fight on Kai!
i shall persevere even if it comes down to a one-man-island.

Killing me softly with his song

2009-09-24T22:58:00.004+08:00

...the song of TOA

i'm getting mentally and physically fatigue. i know i signed up to expect this but when it hits it gets tough to fend it off.

It's not that the work load is any different from previous sems. Subjects this sem are pretty interesting as well, so far with nothing i really despise since most of the work involves doing it the practical way and getting dirty with paint.

But it is like i have nothing much to look forward to daily (except handing in my assignments of course). To make matters worst the spark and life of the class is gradually fading as more of us fall back when we fail to jump over higher hurdles. Sad to say our class jester wasn't exempted. We adept and move on again. The class forms a yet another closer bond since our numbers dwindle again.

Work wise, is it me or i feel our standards are dropping compared with our seniors or are the lects just being evil in showing us the REALLY REALLY GODLIKE works collected over the years. Have i set expectations of myself too highly? Although i know all of us improve ever so slightly but like Beng said, we look at the destination more often than the journey.

How true... those words bring some comfort. I can only hope to reach those levels some day.

Speaking of which my sleeps are getting more and more disturbed. No not nightmares of getting harrassed by sweaty muscular men but dreams related to TOA. If there are assignments left undone, although it is not due the next day, i would find myself having fitful rest in between naps. I have even dreamt of waking up late and missing class, only to suddenly jerk awake covered in cold sweat in the wee hours of the morning.

Sigh, lately my blog posts consists nothing but rant or emo posts. I think i'll take a short break from this place until i get out of this phase. It's a cycle and i'm finding ways to break it.

Tired.....so tired...

Demoralized

2009-09-13T23:30:00.003+08:00

._.

i have no idea why and i hope to get out of it asap.

This sem is supposed to be the sem i'm waiting for. Where i start learning proper CG skills.
But, somehow i don't feel up to it.

Having low esteem problem with my works also lately.
i think i'm in a temporary slump. i hope.

Sem starts

2009-09-08T02:13:00.008+08:00

And so it starts today.....

-----------------------------

On Saturday Monash had its convocation, and i attended it to meet up with my graduating Uni buddies. Puss...we need to go out for yam cha more often. Got holes ignore bros!!! watch it you.

I freagin haet you Monash.....you didn't prepare vegetarian meals when it was my turn. This year you had it. bastards!!! I ate my fill this year.

-----------------------------

On Sunday my old high school buddy came over and dropped his PS3 over at my place. Ian if you're reading this, you are freaking crazy you know that. But i likes it becoz i benefit :D

It will most probably collect dust anyway, since i don't have much time to play games. Still, i sure as hell feel dam lucky cause i had the chance to try out BlazBlue. I still haven't got the hang of it, so it feels pretty sucky right now. You better live up to the being the successor of Guilty Gear.

-----------------------------

Commission i'm working on right now. Madness when i have to start outlining it.

Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha slight yuri action fanart.

Time to hit the sack to rise early for tomorrow's bullcrap.

Why why tell me why??!!

2009-09-04T00:32:00.005+08:00

死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死

杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀杀

AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Next sem monday to saturday class again....WTF is wrong with you TOA. This is not how you should kill your students although it will be achieved gradually. i know i paid money to enter hell but this is too much aaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAaaaaa..............

i don't mind busy, packed schedules/assignments but 6 days per week???!!! i thought that shit was over with together with my foundation days. Weekends was bad enough trying to work on pending assignments, now another day lost for doing work!!! aieeeeeeeeeeeeee...............!!!!!

Petrol dam cheap issit!!!! time not precious one issit. i gotta drive 6 days to college!!! Another notch to non-environmental friendly art college. As if wasting paper wasn't enough. You people should learn how to go green.

-_-

This round the sem break was shorter, i said nevermind. Sem break only ma, it's ok. Turns out something worst awaits me at the end of it now. Time given for self exploration is getting less and less. Social life no need to say. Not that i had any to begin with.

Oh and i'm already raving and ranting this much despite not having attended a class yet. i bet there are even worst stuff coming up soon. There is bound to be one or few subjects which purposely make my life miserable and wonder what the whole point is. Just wait, i can feel it sending slight tremors up my bones already.

-_-

Maybe i should just take less subjects and take a longer time to graduate. At the current rate i'm going i might suffer burnout even before i start working. Seems like each round i tell myself i'm gonna die from the stress of studying for another diploma after my degree. But i always emerge triumph. I wonder how long more my weathered body will last through another tsunami, each more powerful than the previous.

Sigh...time to seek solace with my my 2d beauties.

Gothic Lolita again

2009-09-03T00:11:00.004+08:00

Like i was saying previously, i'm on a streak for gothic lolis. Pity sem break ending soon or i would have loved to do more.

Going for the 'Sweet' Gothic lolita style this time.
Man i suck at drawing flowers.

Another step by step on how i work.

i'll go straight to the outline this time.

Filling in of basest colors. Each diff color on diff layer.

Beefed out some of the defining light and shadow areas.

Touched up the shadow areas again and filled in the base colors for the flowers.

Defined the shades and highlights for the flowers until i'm satisfied that it looks at least like a plant.

Added in more corny graphical elements into the background and touched up the gal.

Hmmmm, cavities yet anyone? Sorry for the dental bill it's gonna incur for you. ;D

Happy Birthday to my Waifu

2009-08-31T16:51:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthday to Hatsune Miku (31st August)

What have i become?

2009-08-27T00:03:00.003+08:00

i am turning creepy and crazy 8D

youtubezzz
warning: do not watch when alone and in the dark

art based on the vid:

normal sketch

reverted it into negative

final product made in wallpaper size, if you're mad enough to use it. i know i am and is currently pimping it as my desktop wallpaper.

Trying out diff stuff. Looks unfinished but i wanted the untidy strokes to give it a creepy feel, just like the vid. Added some texture to it so it doesn't look too flat. Spammed the song non stop while working on it 8D

i'm losing some marbles...

Gothic Lolita

2009-08-25T21:54:00.005+08:00

Oh my sweet fetish, gothic lolita <3

how i missed thee i have a thing for laces, frills and straight fringes.
i feel that it brings out the elegance and femininity of women.
i plan to start spamming gothic fashion in my art again.

Here's another step by step on how i work through my stuff from scratch

The very initial rough sketch. i like to use diff colored outlines so that i don't mess things up.

Outlined the figure.

Outlined the background.

Filled in the basest colors and started shaping out the shadow areas before i start detailing.

Touched up the shadow areas and added a heavier tone to the darker areas. Tweaked the color to a bit less saturated.

Added the shading for the background. Again i darkened some shade areas and tweaked the colors until i was satisfied.

i realised how i missed cging in cool colors. Lately all i've been doing is color in warm, reddish purplish hues.

i used to shun gothic lolita fashion when i was first introduced to it. That was around 6-7 years back when i was still pretty shallow (still is now). Every time i see someone posting artworks on this theme i didn't spare it a second glance. I thought then this style was dark, scary, taboo-ish. I had no idea why i thought that way at that time.

Now? i dig it. i give thanks to the day it was founded. if i ever get a gf she'll be unfortunate enough to end up being dressed in this fashion at least once by me. (i hope)

*ahem*........ anyways, what i was trying to get at is that to keep minds open at all times. Don't turn down something the first time. Give it a chance to digest in the mind and by then it's your choice not to like it. i learnt not to judge something immediately now but to look indepth and give it a chance before signing it off.

End of Sem + GACC

2009-08-19T23:10:00.013+08:00

Finally sem break is here! though this round i don't think it's very long coz our classes got dragged another week.

Anyhow, this post features some of the works did during the sem.

Typography CD cover, non of the images belong to me although i did trace some of them in Illustrator.

outside

inside

CGPP board game

mix of Smarties and Katamari Damacy

Illustration Fundamentals Final. Wish i did a better job but i'm not brave enough to venture beyond using color pencils alone. I always have fear of trying new stuff without prior guidance.

uugghh i suck at the composition

-------------------------------------

Prior to sem break, last weekend was GACC (game,anime,comic, convention) down at Malacca. It was a 2 day event and i had to drive down to and fro for 2 days, fortunately swapping between my bro and me.

Turn out wasn't so good this year, since everyone is so hyped up about H1N1. Can't blame them after the number of deaths reported. Anyways, overall the event wasn't as awesome as previous year and it's not because it is missing the Seiyuu. Well, it's just lacking i guess, from the way things were organized down to the control of the event. Anyhow, the Emcees were still as awesome.

Day 1 character design competition which i again joined and bagged nothing :D
Sorcery is the theme given this time and, knowing the mass majority will draw witches (which 2 out of the top 3 bagged the position, 1 was a sorcerous), i decided to go for witch-doctor-shaman-thingy, to which i think i might have fared better if i drew witches lmao. Well, trying to do something different sucks sometimes huh? xD

oh my, maybe this looks more like a fairy, but it's still sorcery ain't it!

Regardless, i still enjoyed it and i can feel my brain juices really flow when a time limit is imposed. Time for some humble pills, i'm just not there yet lol. But i'll keep trying until i do again! Just like the gold medal for my Hammer piece.

Driving around Malacca town, i noticed a shop which coincidentally has my nick on it, "KAIZER" in caps and yellow in color with a stark red background filling. It's a food outlet selling chicken and something i can't remember. Too bad din manage to snap a pic of the sign board. XD Now i can tell people i have a restaurant in Malacca.

-------------------------------------

On day 2 since there were no competitions to join (YES GACC, WHAT HAPPENED TO GUILTY GEAR TOURNAMENT???!!) Surface doujin group leader Pcmaniac aka Peach, mutilated Mio from K-ON...

wat the....CAN'T UNSEE!!!

his original piece that was sold in the K-ON set...

And so, i decided to have my own revenge on him when he went out for lunch...

XD Yui?

original piece courtesy of PC again...find his works here > Peach Artworks

I had a good laugh over it and we burnt each other's eyes out. Almost made an all out war drawing each others gallery into manly renditions. Fortunately we came to an agreement not to.

Later i got commissioned to draw my own character here below. Strangest request yet since usually fanarts are the things requested.

Got back from Malacca and KO-ed. Took a long time to fully recover my energies. Long distance driving suxxors.

K-ON! Mio!

2009-08-10T02:44:00.006+08:00

The initial rough sketch after trying to capture gesture with strokes

Oh shi....i only knew she was left handed after i finished outlining

No problemo! Once i was done cging i flipped it.
Just gotta love working digitally.
'Horizontal Flip' for the win!

Added background and voila <3

Woohoo~! Finally finished this. This be Mio from the anime K-ON! It's for my new doujin group "SURFACE". Will be printed and sold during GACC which is this weekend!

Time to concentrate on Gan's final assignment now...

Another one to the collection

2009-08-06T01:39:00.005+08:00

Caught up with some Monash-ian friends last Sunday and watched Ice Age 3. Squirrel dood for the win!!! Went for dinner after that and spent time catching up on the years we haven't seen each other

I got a wonderful cap from Australia as a gift from a dear friend!

I like collecting hats, and my fav kind happens to be the ones where the top is flat instead of rounded. I got about 5 pretty unique caps currently + the one i just got from a close friend.

Rushed home at night for an all-nighter date with a board game final project for CGPP.
Will make another post for my assignment works later.

Handed the darn board game to the print shop on Tuesday. Now to wait for the results of printing, write a rationalle for it and i'm done with the tedious subject.

What we did for life drawing class on Tuesday was awesome. We had a practice where we drew our friends by not looking at the paper. All their faces turned out distorted but still recognizable as the person itself XD

I found Beng's one to be the most hilarious, thus the pics below.

Chair's rendition of Beng

My renditon of the retard xD

I think this is how caricatures were born....

Thank you Mr. Beng

2009-08-02T01:08:00.004+08:00

Such good friends i have. No really! i mean it!!

Courtesy of Mr. Beng, who informed me with gusto over this particular page.

de...de.....DEJAVU!
Great Teacher Onizuka Shonan 14 days, Chapter 5 page 10

Karma has a way of going round Beng. I needn't retaliate.

There's a bug in my soup...

2009-07-31T15:37:00.003+08:00

Well, not exactly soup. And not exactly a bug.

I was having lunch just now with Jun, Daniel and Beng, digging into my porridge and yakking away on our usual nonsense.

Suddenly i bit on something like plastic after scooping it into my mouth. I lost it while chewing so i dug around my mouth with my tongue. Found that plastic-feeling piece of thing and eventually took it out with my fingers.

Loooo and Behoooold.....

A cockroach leg...

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By now i suppose you would assume that i would throw up the contents in my mouth, vomit everything into the toilet bowl, and make a hell of a commotion.

Didn't happen though unfortunately. I just chewed the remaining porridge in my mouth, swallowed it, left the leg on the table, and asked Beng to summon the boss.

I was quite surprised at my own neutrality towards this. I always assumed that if i found something gross in my food i would totally freak out and make a big boo boo about it. Turns out i was pretty calm.

Though i didn't bother finishing my almost empty bowl of porridge. I fished around the remaining contents to see if there were any other parts of the cockroach. Fortunately nothing else. I do pay attention to each spoon i put into my mouth so i don't think i ate the body. Besides i didn't feel anything crunchy.

So anyway, the boss arrived, i showed her the leg, pointed to my porridge, told here that was where i found it, and asked her to check the remaining pot in the kitchen for any traces of cockroach. She scooped off the cockroach leg with tissues, apologized and walked off for a bit.

Later she came back with my refund (which i tried to refuse) and apologized profusely although i really didn't mind. I just had to ask her to double check that pot of porridge again.

Wow, something interesting actually happens to me. Now i have experienced first hand how it was like to have a cockroach leg in my meal. No sarcasm intended. Tastes and feels like plastic...

A Series of Unfortunate Events

2009-07-27T21:30:00.002+08:00

Vunderful...

My Desktop Computer dieded on 27/07/09 which was just last night. There goes spamming my favourite songs while i work. Somehow it always gives me problems towards the busiest moments of my semester. Fortunately i always do my TOA related work on my laptop. There goes producting new CGs for a time...

I left/lost my pencil case full of my trusty art tools at Zhia's Kitchen today for lunch. I hope it's still there tomorrow hopefully kept by the staff.

I made a stupid mistake of outlining my strokes before printing my SpongeBob packaging. I lost the bone design i did for the border of the back flap in the printing. Sigh i'm gonna just hand it in since it costed me some money there.

I can't really do simplified figures now that my tools are missing. I have to dig out some scraps of stationary that i have stashed somewhere to resume.

Stress is building up since the final assignments are all pilling in. I'm not good at handling stress eversince the days at Monash. Bear with me if i accidently yell at you or give you cold shoulders. I'm not in the bests of mood now.

Gone were the days

2009-07-26T11:26:00.002+08:00

Gone were the days that being virtuous was a natural inherent thing for us human beings. Neighbors constantly watch your back, strangers lending hands to one another with no qualms, less incidences driven on by greed by taking what is rightfully not yours, just to cite a few examples.

Now it is a big surprise for you to see be able those things again. Some of us barely know our own neighbors. Why so? because it is not the norm anymore and everyone is suspected of doing us harm instead. We have grown wary of our surroundings; constantly on guard for unscrupulous beings.

Is it right to say society shaped us into what we are today?
but why let society shape you?
We shall shape the society instead.
Much like "Ask not what the government can do for you, Ask what you can do for the government."

It might not be much, but we need to start somewhere.
Make it a point to be the change you want to see, although the rest of the rat race is otherwise.
Sometimes a small change is what it needs to start the ball rolling.
And that small change might be you...

Ghosts...

2009-07-19T00:01:00.003+08:00

Ah, i was suddenly interested in bringing this up.

I do believe they exist around us all the time, it is whether we are blessed (or cursed) to be able to see them. I choose to think of it as a parallel world or one of a different dimension. I am fortunate that i have not been graced or even encountered one in my years of life up till now. I hope there isn't an exception to my future. I respect its existence and dare not challenge it although i am quite a scientifically rationale person.

Truth is, i am very afraid of such things. It is natural for humans to fear the unknown. In my case i have always been exceptionally paranoid and afraid of ghosts. I used to recall having to sleep with my parents for a week as a child after watching horror movies. Sometimes even longer. I was a kid that was very, very, afraid of the dark and always had to sleep with a night lamp.

Even though i was sharing rooms with my bro back then, i was always afraid once the lights went off at night. I slept at the bottom bunk of the double deck bed and usually my mind goes wild when i lay on it, thinking about the things lurking beneath the void of my bed. I know it was all imagination but i felt afraid and lay very still each night, willing myself to doze off.

To further bring in proof of my paranoia, going into a room with no one by myself IN MY OWN HOUSE was enough to scare me. I always found the lights switch pronto, say a little prayer for myself and got in. Darkness scares the hell out of me. I hallucinate that at anytime ghosts appear in front of me unbidden.

Also my old house used to be quite small. At night when i worked on my pc in the 2nd floor out in the hall, i am very afraid of the stairs behind me when no one is downstairs anymore. The darkness beneath scares me that i have to look over my back occasionally to assure myself. And let me tell you that i was at about 18-20 of age. I guess the passing of my grandad years before then did nothing to sooth my nerves. I told myself it was silly of having to fear the presence of my own imaginary grandad but i still freak myself somehow.

I did eventually get out of this fear of darkness, but horror movies and stuff related to horrors are a no-go for me. I will feel really uncomfortable for a few days to weeks after watching em. I am almost practically immune to gore and blood, but ghosts? nuh uh. Still scares the shit out of me kthanxbai! If i had a girlfriend and we somehow ended up watching horror movies, i will be totally hopeless in trying to act brave. Instead high chance i would be the one hiding my head in her fair bosoms, weeping like a little terrified child. (and taking advantage)

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I have heard stories of people having the '3rd eye' which enables them to see ghosts. Some used to have it when they were kids and eventually grew out of it. Some got it after getting into accidents. Some just have it all the time and choose to remain quiet about it.

I can't imagine myself being able to see them all the time. I will freak out maximus. I am curious though, how would those who can see ghosts since they were born feel about it. Numb? Normal like breathing? or is that why we have mad people around?

So to wrap this up, i think i have given more ammunition to people who want to seek revenge on me. Don't say that i'm not kind enough to let you know what gets to me. But i wont go watch horror films with you willingly. Not unless you tie me up and drag me there, to which you can try.

Enjoy first, Die later

2009-07-15T02:37:00.008+08:00

Well, yea. I had a good time at Daicon during the weekend last week, and now i'm suffering like shit trying to catch up on the work i had not done or touched at all.

You see, last week on Saturday and Sunday there was an ACG event (short for Anime, Cosplay, Games) at Cyberjaya. More precisely in MMU. I was there with my bro and he was the camera man for 2 days. He finds nothing interesting out of these events and so, proceeds to ask me why i always find it enjoyable to attend it from the time it starts till the end.

Why? I wasn't so sure myself until i gave it some thought. I guess it's due to the fact that people attending this event smells the same as me. And when all of us gather at the same place at the same time, i seem to resonate accordingly and in perfect harmony with the surrounding 'chi' on the molecular level. It is a pleasant feeling that i cannot describe. Much like i think if you hang out in the library you naturally want to study sort of thing.

That is not the only reason though, i like to meet a new pool of art talents related to my hobby and at the same time, inspire those starting out to follow onto my footsteps. It is nice to see that my amateur-ish works help inspire some of the budding artists who want to take onto manga-style art. Also, when i sell my wares (which this time around are only badges) i love to see the happy faces my customers have. I guess that is why i love doing what i'm doing.

Also, during such events, i do not have to worry about restraining and composing myself from acting like a moron and idiot. No one judges the way you act as they too, let go of their reigns. Sometimes i like looking at what embarrassing things some people might do and laugh out thinking to myself that i would not repeat what he/she did. I think the same happens when i do something outrageous as well :P (well it's contageous)

Neways, nothing much happened on day 1 except my badges of 75 were sold till 9 were left. Also i discovered some people have weird commission tastes. Here is what i meant.

Rei Ayanami from Evangelion doing a Kamen Rider 'Henshin' or transformation pose. -_-;;

Slightly more stuff happened on day 2. I joined a character design art competition. Didn't win as usual but i'm still pretty happy with my own stuff. 2nd and 3rd place was taken by my Kamcao doujin group members :)

I dunno what happened to the original prize, which was supposed to be airbrushes, i heard rumours that it got stolen. So they got cash instead ;A; *screams silently in jealousy*

3rd place by Daniel Lee. Didn't snap the other works sorry ^^;;

my entry, well...sorta reused but yea i love this design. I broke the rules which was why i assumed i missed the chance to grab a position :P (I'm just blowing my ego up to feel better orz) Wasn't supposed to depict religious-related material which i did with the wings and halo. bleh.

After the competition was the arrival of the 'Seiyuu' (voice actor) Chihara Minorin at around 3.30pm for her concert. She voiced acted Chiaki from the anime Minami-ke, Yuki Nagato from the anime "The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi", and etc. I wasn't particularly interested but i guess this is the closest thing i would come to attending a 'concert'. I didn't get special tickets to see her upclose but it was good enough all the way back at the hall. I had some friends who managed to secure tickets and ended up having sexy voices after screaming throughout the concert.

Somewhere along the concert, Chihara used Chiaki's voice and said "Malaysia saiko da bakayarou" which meant "Malaysia is awesome, Idiot!". Many took it as an insult because they did not understand that she was voicing and playing out Chiaki's role lmao. Research up people if you are true fans xD.

Back to the weekly routine of unlimited home works.
I am the bone of my pencil...Over a thousand prons i have drawn...Unlimited HOMEWORKS.

i need a break...

I AM THE HAMMER!

2009-07-04T18:37:00.007+08:00

Well, remember the bitching i did about not winning contests at this entry? >>> here-we-go-again

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GUESS I JUST BROKE THAT CYCLE AND STRUCK GOLD!!!
Literally struck GOLD!!

holy sh...

'I am The Hammer. I am the sword in His hand. I am the Gauntlet about His fist. I am the Bane of His foes and the woes of the treacherous. I am the End.' ~Grey Knights

Sob, it was certainly overwhelming when i found out about it. Tricia was even more excited than i was when she gave me a ring on Wednesday to congratulate me. She congratulated a very blur me before telling me that she saw my name on the list of gold medalists xD

"Many, many heartfelt Thanx to all who sms-ed/called me to give your congrats to me m(_ _)m"

The impact didn't really sink in until my slow brain took a couple of minutes to digest what i just heard. Then i was shaking uncontrollably with excitement lol. I was finally able to taste the experience of achieving something i have longed for for so long. After those relentless and bitter past track records of failing that i had T_T finally....

My 2nd entry.
Poor Midnight Carnival didn't manage to bag anything. xD

It must be partly due to those numbing experiences that drove me to never give up, to further outdo my previous selves. Like what Kin Sun said, what's more important is that each new piece that you work on, make sure that it is a little-teeny-weeny-bit better than the previous. Gradually time will bear the fruits of labor.

Of course, although i did manage to snatch the gold medalist title for Manga Illus category, i am far from remaining content. I know that i am still very 'amateur-ish' and that there is a lot of room for improvement (a room as big as the universe). Looking at this piece now i feel that the judges must have made a mistake to have awarded my sub-par work with a gold. Nevertheless, i am thankful for the opportunity they have given me.

The day i entered The One Academy has been a day of blessing (as well as a sweet torture). I am very fortunate to have my family's support for me in this eccentrical line that i am towing. I will treasure and cherish the skills/knowledge that i have gained in my endevour here, be it bitter or sweet. It feels good to be reminded that it is through a conscious choice on my own part that i am still where i am today.

It's a Trend!!!

2009-06-28T21:55:00.004+08:00

It's a TREND!!!
lol so happens the usual blogs i visit are all inactive. And to think that i was the only one to go out of action for a while. Oh well, the usual stuff. Pre-occupied with college work, come home get lazy and just want to slack.

I just watched Transformers return of the Fallen twice last week and damn i am hell easy to please. I just love it so much because i grew up in the era when Transformers cartoon was my staple. It feels like time rewound itself and i was a little kid again, sitting in front of the television set and wishing that i was living in a world painted in the animation. I sure as hell regret giving away all my Transformers related toys!!! how those would fetch fairly high prices if i were to ebay it as some collector's item.

Somehow i feel the quality of toys back when i was kid was way much better than the toys they have now. The genuine Hasbro line of toys for Transformers now feel so cheap and plasticky that i wonder how they can charge that sort of price for it. Must be all the made in China thingy and cost-cutting-maximizing-profit thingy.

Anyways, i realise i have not been spreading enough kai-ism philosophies lately. Turns out i might be in a writer's block. I need to plan what to write to properly convert/corrupt a few followers into the path i'm taking. I just keep the point brief this time.

I like to "Work smart instead of work hard". I love taking shortcuts to achieve the same results or better. Well, doesn't work all the time (resulting in even harder work) but still at least i get the job done and it squeezes my brain juice to the limit to think of ways to cheat. Now cheat is too strong a word so i rephrase it to "deviate from norm". It may turn out unorthodox sometimes but who has to know bohahaha.

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Oh well, lacking in time lately to actually do major works, so i'm churning out some simple works to make into badges. I hope to make a few more before Daicon (anime manga convention) to sell during the event itself. I'm doing a lot of works on my wife lately i'm so sorry ;A; i just love her too much.

"I want my strawberry shortcake and pudding now!"
spoilt little thing ain't she.....i want to spoil her further <3

Down with the Bug

2009-06-15T23:39:00.004+08:00

my, my, ain't my wife gorgeous?
*whispers frombeyond - self praise is no praise*

I did not deem fit to update my blog, i told myself, until i have finished this piece. Well, it's already a day or two after finishing it and i'm not up to it now to make a decent entry. You see, i have been hit with a wave of lethargy, body aches, and light-headedness. In more understandable terms, fallen sick...

やる気がありません．．．そうして体もクタクタ, 病気だ。何もやらない欲しくて、ゴロゴロしたい。。。
宿題はどうかな～　大変だよね．．．(´～`；；)

I'm not feeling tops to properly structure my content so i'll just make short paragraphs that are non-related.

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Right after Gan's color pencil demo and hints, i tested the color combination for shadows he taught....and found that i have been subconsciously applying it already all the time :/
without actually knowing the reason behind it though. Warm colors brings something out and cool the opposite effect in creating depth.

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Green used to be the least faved color to me in the color wheel. But as time passes and i got infatuated with my current waifu, which portrait i just did in Art Nouveau style, i became accustomed to it and accept it. The wonders my waifu could do to change a man.

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Tay, the lecturer for our CGPP, he's semi-vegetarian. Came as a slight surprise to me. Me and the gang were having our usual Wednesday-All-Vege-Night at Evergreen restaurant when he dined there with his family as well. Turns out his wife is full-time vegetarian like me. Power of women again.

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Behind every successful man is a woman. Ohhh Miku thanx for all the support!!! i shall be successful too one day. One Day. ONE DAY. ONE DAY!!!!

ok i mus sign off, i'm close to dropping limp on my keyboard.